Konrad and Alexandra (PDF) - Rolf Gross

He had started with representational subjects, many with a religious content, Russian and Bavarian saints, several St.Georges. Slowly the human form dissolved into abstract signs. A yellow cow filling most of the canvas—according toSteiner yellow is female. Your Anima is yellow! One canvas, called Impression 19, Konzert, reminded Alexandra of theevening at the Dahls—you are right, the black grand piano, Steiner, the guests. Still earlier: Murnau almost fullyrepresentational—and among these smaller paintings a dreamscape, The Woman in Moscow, 1912.A disembodied Russian woman floating above a street scene, her left arm partially missing, the other hand holding asmall dog on a flower stand, half-hidden behind the woman a fiaker in flight and floating suspended a large, black blob…An apparition? On the street a pink spot. A rose? A faded puddle of blood? A discarded female napkin?Alexandra stood rooted before the painting, magically attracted by the black blob flying above the scene. She blurted."Her name is Nina."Kandinsky took a step backwards. He tucked his chin in and stared at Alexandra. "How did you guess? Are youclairvoyant?""Sometimes I am and I dislike myself for it. I met Nina in St. Petersburg many years ago."For the rest of the evening Kandinsky was despondent, his high spirits suddenly gone. He invited them to dinner in thevillage Gasthaus. Nina and the painting were not mentioned again.Alexandra berated herself for her thoughtlessness. But how could she have anticipated his reaction?The black spot is he, she answered her own question, I should have guessed that.Clara, trying to patch Alexandra’s faux-pas, inquired what he planned to do with his oeuvre. It would already fill a smallmuseum. Kandinsky shrugged, he was under no pressure to sell. He had a large number of paintings stored in Munich.Time would solve that question.When they left, Kandinsky gave Alexandra a copy of his book Über das Geistige in der Kunst, on the spiritual in art, witha dedication in German:Für Alexandra Dadiani, die georgische Prinzessin, die mich ermutigte den Weg in die Abstraktion zu suchen—ForAlexandra Dadiani, the Georgian princess, who encouraged me to look for the way into abstraction.After what had happened, Alexandra was mortified by this gift.Kandinsky smiled. His last words were in Russian. "I am deeply obliged to you. Nina is waiting for me in Moscow."59.Alexandra's return via Tiflis1913Alexandra spent the day in a reclining chair on deck. The ship plowed the blue Aegean Sea towards Constantinople.The Cycladic Islands, bare, tree-less rocks crowned by white-washed villages, drifted through the clear, sunny day. Shefound that she did not remember any of these islands, it must have been night when they passed the Aegean on theirhoneymoon.For two days she had walked through Venice in search of Konrad. The city still exerted its spell on her. In a weakmoment she had toyed with the thought of finding a man to make love to. But Konrad’s presence was so strong, that shecould not imagine another man would be able to satisfy her longings. How could she recover the fleeting reflections inwhich she had seen their love?She had visited the Accademia to look for her favorite Giorgione. This time the painting no longer spoke to her. It lookedsmaller than she remembered. Should one not attempt to repeat such highs? The mood, the longings of another timecannot be recreated.On the second day she felt that someone was following her. Disturbed, she took refuge in a church. She waited in thecold and musty place and carefully watched the people who came in, genuflected in front of the altar, prayed, or lit acandle and left. They came and went. No one paid attention to the lonely tourist.The church felt like a tomb, gray marble, a second-rate altar, cold, exalted memorials along the walls, dust and grime.None of the euphoria that had once rescued her in Santa-Anna-im-Lehel in Munich.This fear of being followed was not her usual Georgian affliction, it lay deeper, it would not disappear on its own or bedismissed by a simple movement of her hand.A voice came from behind her left shoulder. "Your death is watching you."The voice was not threatening, rather, the words were delivered in a calm, matter of fact tone. There was no one around.She was entirely alone.189