specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
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CHAPTER I<br />
cantly help avoiding further problems <strong>and</strong> pathologies that can be ultimately<br />
developed.<br />
There were c<strong>as</strong>es identified when <strong>children</strong> lacking adequate information<br />
about the changes that occur during puberty were overreacting, living<br />
stressful moments when entering the period <strong>of</strong> sexual maturation. A primary<br />
school teacher from a rural school, participating in the focus group<br />
discussions, recalls the c<strong>as</strong>e <strong>of</strong> a girl aged 9 or 10, whose mother <strong>left</strong> when<br />
she w<strong>as</strong> only 4 years old: “The girl had her first menstrual cycle... The child<br />
w<strong>as</strong> not ready, she got scarred, <strong>and</strong> she thought she w<strong>as</strong> going to die. She<br />
called me <strong>and</strong> I could not underst<strong>and</strong> what w<strong>as</strong> happening to her, I did not<br />
know how to help her… She ran to her aunt in Nisporeni” (FG_EC_rural).<br />
It is obvious that the girl did not receive the necessary knowledge about<br />
hygiene norms <strong>and</strong> proper behaviour <strong>of</strong> women during these particular<br />
physiological situations, which may have a negative influence on the reproductive<br />
system.<br />
Another problem in the sexual education <strong>of</strong> girls arises when they remain<br />
in the care <strong>of</strong> their father, who is not always ready to talk about<br />
intimate topics with his daughter. Here is the example <strong>of</strong> an 11 year old<br />
girl whose mother h<strong>as</strong> been abroad for 5 years. The girl together with<br />
her younger brother is cared for by their father: “I saw my mother l<strong>as</strong>t<br />
time in March. I am getting along with my father. When he tells me to do<br />
something, I do it, if I cannot – I do it later <strong>and</strong> he does not mind. I talk to<br />
him, but I cannot tell him all my secrets, I feel embarr<strong>as</strong>sed. He <strong>as</strong>ks me if<br />
everything’s good <strong>and</strong> I do not tell him... One evening I w<strong>as</strong> crying <strong>and</strong> he<br />
<strong>as</strong>ked me what w<strong>as</strong> wrong, <strong>and</strong> I did not tell him because I felt embarr<strong>as</strong>sed.<br />
He told me that we should go to a doctor but I did not want. Then he called<br />
my mom <strong>and</strong> I talked to her <strong>and</strong> I told her that my bre<strong>as</strong>t hurt. She told me<br />
that it w<strong>as</strong> something normal because I am growing <strong>and</strong> my bre<strong>as</strong>t hurts<br />
because it is growing too. She also told me to be careful but I didn’t underst<strong>and</strong><br />
why...” (III_C_6).<br />
The mother’s absence during the process <strong>of</strong> sexual education <strong>of</strong> a young<br />
woman can be perceived in the following c<strong>as</strong>e: “We cannot talk to our<br />
father openly. He stays less at home. We talk about the house... I cannot<br />
tell him about the problems that bother me... I cannot talk to my<br />
aunts either. They have their own families, <strong>children</strong> <strong>and</strong> their problems...”<br />
(IIL_C_19).<br />
It is very important to talk to <strong>children</strong> about sexual maturity at le<strong>as</strong>t<br />
when puberty comes. Adolescents should receive accurate information<br />
according to their age <strong>and</strong> ability to underst<strong>and</strong>. This can spare them many<br />
sexual problems. The main questions related to sexuality begin to appear<br />
around the age <strong>of</strong> 12, sometimes even earlier. Appropriate sexual education<br />
h<strong>as</strong> an extremely important role in the reduction <strong>of</strong> risks <strong>of</strong> having<br />
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