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specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova

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Values <strong>and</strong> life plans<br />

abroad <strong>as</strong> I don’t like the life I have <strong>and</strong> I can’t solve the problems by<br />

myself ” (III_C_17).<br />

For most <strong>of</strong> the interviewed <strong>children</strong> the family sets examples <strong>of</strong> communication<br />

<strong>and</strong> behaviour. Although social representations <strong>of</strong> the<br />

family differ depending on the <strong>children</strong>’s age (for younger <strong>children</strong><br />

– <strong>as</strong> an example is the nuclear family <strong>and</strong> for the elder ones – the family<br />

they will create themselves), the family is perceived <strong>as</strong> a unit that<br />

supports everybody, even in difficult situations. It is important that<br />

some <strong>of</strong> the <strong>children</strong> would like to live with their family although<br />

there is a risk to live plainly.<br />

The <strong>elderly</strong><br />

• Values <strong>of</strong> the <strong>elderly</strong> people<br />

The <strong>elderly</strong> people appreciate the traditional family, where gr<strong>and</strong>parents<br />

<strong>and</strong> parents express their love, concern <strong>and</strong> support for their<br />

<strong>children</strong> <strong>and</strong> the <strong>children</strong> should feel their parents’ loving union <strong>and</strong><br />

all the responsibilities they have towards their <strong>children</strong>. “I w<strong>as</strong> considering<br />

myself so rich when I w<strong>as</strong> coming home from work, I w<strong>as</strong> working<br />

in 5 villages...I w<strong>as</strong> longing to see all my <strong>children</strong> sound <strong>and</strong> happy<br />

jumping around me <strong>and</strong> searching my pockets for c<strong>and</strong>ies or sweets”<br />

(III_E_5).<br />

The respondents sketch the model <strong>of</strong> the traditional family <strong>and</strong> not<br />

the model <strong>of</strong> “the family at distance”: “if all my <strong>children</strong> come back<br />

home we would have a dinner together. I hope to feel well <strong>and</strong> to see<br />

them safe <strong>and</strong> sound” (IIA_E_6); “I would like to have them all together<br />

here in the town, nearby” (III_E_8), an underst<strong>and</strong>ing <strong>of</strong> the<br />

traditional family responsibilities: to raise <strong>children</strong>, to take care <strong>of</strong><br />

old people, are more <strong>of</strong>ten neglected. These are shared among other<br />

social institutions that do not give them love <strong>and</strong> affection.<br />

The study stresses the fact that most <strong>of</strong>ten the remittances do not<br />

have a significant value for the <strong>elderly</strong>. The desire to have their family<br />

near <strong>and</strong> to reach the old age taking care <strong>of</strong> gr<strong>and</strong><strong>children</strong> is a real<br />

option for the <strong>elderly</strong>: “Although <strong>children</strong> have good jobs, <strong>and</strong> send<br />

them parcels <strong>and</strong> money monthly, they don’t need all this but want to be<br />

supported <strong>and</strong> to have the child near” (FG_EE_urban_rural).<br />

The importance <strong>of</strong> the native home, so valued in our tradition is<br />

stressed especially by institutionalized old people: “no where is like<br />

home”; “it is better at home”, <strong>as</strong> their stay in an <strong>as</strong>ylum <strong>and</strong> the absence<br />

<strong>of</strong> everything they inherited or worked for all their life is painful.<br />

The fact <strong>of</strong> becoming aware <strong>of</strong> this situation is veiled with accept-<br />

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