specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova
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CHAPTER I<br />
1.5. The integrity <strong>of</strong> migrant families<br />
Children<br />
• Families <strong>and</strong> generation changes<br />
The results <strong>of</strong> the study denote changes in the relationship between <strong>children</strong><br />
<strong>and</strong> parents living abroad, referring especially to the quantity <strong>and</strong> quality <strong>of</strong><br />
communication, which deters family cohesion <strong>and</strong> integrity. Some <strong>children</strong><br />
(especially those who have both parents working abroad) mentioned that they<br />
feel deprived from the family support, <strong>and</strong> that their social support network<br />
h<strong>as</strong> been affected. For instance, an interviewee concluded that she became<br />
“more mature, I’m doing things on my own, I have learnt to do everything<br />
by myself, to solve my problems” (III_C_1). The changes within the family are<br />
mostly highlighted by the status <strong>and</strong> role changes that <strong>children</strong> <strong>left</strong> <strong>behind</strong><br />
are being exposed to. At such an early age they have to take over their parents<br />
responsibilities: “I kind <strong>of</strong> feel like a mother” (III_C_4). Usually, the child h<strong>as</strong> to<br />
become mature at an early stage, therefore to <strong>as</strong>sume serious responsibilities.<br />
Sometimes there is an improvement in the relationship between the migrant<br />
parents <strong>and</strong> the <strong>children</strong> <strong>left</strong> <strong>behind</strong> at home: “Lately I have started<br />
to get along with my mom much better, we’re always together, we laugh more”<br />
(III_C_2); “I get along very well with my father <strong>and</strong> I can talk to him whenever<br />
I need to” (III_C_28), <strong>and</strong> sometimes – these relationships worsen: “I talk<br />
to my mother (the mother is abroad) quite well, I can pour my soul out to her...<br />
my father doesn’t underst<strong>and</strong> me, I even fear him... I hate him” (III_C_22). It<br />
should be mentioned that such situations do not appear over night, they<br />
follow the relationship patterns that are <strong>specific</strong> for these families during<br />
the pre-migration period, making it more severe <strong>and</strong> complicated.<br />
During the study, the situations that disturbed the family functionality were<br />
identified: when <strong>children</strong> had to learn to build relationships in totally different<br />
conditions that they got used to. The experts we interviewed brought,<br />
<strong>as</strong> an example, the c<strong>as</strong>e <strong>of</strong> a divorce <strong>as</strong> a result <strong>of</strong> migration, where both<br />
parents built a new family <strong>and</strong> the child replied to this situation through “not<br />
wanting to live with my mom or dad”, which can be explained by the change<br />
<strong>of</strong> the interactions with his parents – “they are very cold” (FG_C_4_rural).<br />
The changes within the family disturb the communicational area, the<br />
learning <strong>of</strong> new social roles <strong>and</strong> forced <strong>as</strong>sumption <strong>of</strong> new responsibilities.<br />
All these generate subsequent changes at the generation level. Thus, the<br />
modern family within the society m<strong>as</strong>sively affected by migration poses<br />
a risk to the maintenance <strong>of</strong> traditional values <strong>and</strong> integrity <strong>of</strong> the family.<br />
• The lack <strong>of</strong> care<br />
The study shows that the lack <strong>of</strong> parental care, manifested by the t<strong>as</strong>ks<br />
performed by <strong>children</strong>, affect their harmonious development by reducing<br />
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