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specific needs of children and elderly left behind as a ... - IOM Moldova

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Psychological <strong>and</strong> social effects <strong>of</strong> migration<br />

ing the emotional processes that <strong>children</strong> <strong>left</strong> <strong>behind</strong> experience w<strong>as</strong> the<br />

intensity. The power, the force, the pr<strong>of</strong>oundness <strong>of</strong> separation <strong>and</strong> loneliness<br />

<strong>as</strong> emotional experiences shown <strong>as</strong> a continuous longing (in Romanian<br />

language “dor”) w<strong>as</strong> expressed by the majority <strong>of</strong> <strong>children</strong>. The<br />

study shows the direct <strong>and</strong>/or indirect presence <strong>of</strong> the longing <strong>of</strong> <strong>children</strong><br />

for their parents in most c<strong>as</strong>es. Their answers prove that the intensity <strong>of</strong><br />

their emotional experiences depend on the emotional value that parents<br />

have for their <strong>children</strong> <strong>as</strong> well <strong>as</strong> on child’s emotional capacity.<br />

We concluded that some <strong>children</strong> experience severe emotions derived<br />

from the separation from their parents <strong>and</strong> the way they perceive their<br />

own family. This observation is also true for <strong>children</strong> who continue living<br />

in their families <strong>as</strong> well <strong>as</strong> for those who are institutionalized after their<br />

parents’ departure. For instance, the essays on the topic <strong>of</strong> family reflect<br />

their intense emotional excitement linked to the trauma they experienced<br />

when separating from one or both <strong>of</strong> their parents: ,,A rock full <strong>of</strong> darkness<br />

<strong>and</strong> a c<strong>and</strong>le that is about to fade is my family now. Even if my aunt <strong>and</strong><br />

uncle are close I miss my mother’s s<strong>of</strong>t glow <strong>of</strong> her hazel eyes <strong>and</strong> her s<strong>of</strong>t lips<br />

smile. I live with the idea that in 6 months or maybe a year, they will be back,<br />

<strong>and</strong> I pray to God to give them force, patience, health to get home safe. My<br />

family is like an altar with no chancel – I have a family but I miss my mom’s<br />

sweet words <strong>and</strong> my father’s powerful voice. You cannot even imagine how<br />

much I want to have a family to feel happy, but now, if the possibility is not<br />

there I just sit all day long <strong>and</strong> live a dream: that my parents are home again.<br />

You, who have a family, take good care <strong>of</strong> it <strong>as</strong> if you lose you will never be<br />

able to regain it again” (E_13_14 years old_female_family).<br />

The content <strong>of</strong> the stories told by <strong>children</strong> denote that they are scared <strong>of</strong><br />

loneliness, a feeling that can be explained in psychoanalysis by the fear<br />

<strong>of</strong> losing their parents. The lack <strong>of</strong> love, attention <strong>and</strong> appreciation from<br />

their parents is felt intensely. The <strong>children</strong>’s emotional experience is very<br />

important for the personality in their childhood. The <strong>children</strong>’s affectivity<br />

is deprived from the care <strong>of</strong> their family because <strong>of</strong> their parent’s migration.<br />

The emotional lack, <strong>as</strong> shown by the data <strong>of</strong> the qualitative research<br />

appears <strong>as</strong> a disturbing condition that finally leads to frustration <strong>and</strong> emotional<br />

stiffness. In order to free themselves <strong>of</strong> the emotional burden they<br />

experience because <strong>of</strong> separation they write poems, thus expressing their<br />

emotions:<br />

A Poem for Parents<br />

I look through the window<br />

And I wait for them to come<br />

So that our house will be filled again<br />

With happiness, smiles <strong>and</strong> bread for the table.<br />

I want to see my mother sewing<br />

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