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CHAPTER I obvious. The girl is alone, having to face a problem that will have a long-term impact on both moral and physical health of the minor. BOX 5 Case study on abortions among children left behind as a consequence of parental labour migration (III_C_17) Daniela, a 17 year old girl from the rural area who currently lives with her aunt, both of her parents are abroad. When her parents left she was not asked an opinion. Today her situation has worsened. The interviewed confesses that a lot has changed in her life: “I became even more closed up. I know that I should talk more, but this is what I need”. At only 17 years old she got pregnant with her boyfriend whom she has been dating for a couple of years. According to her, her parents do not know about it. “I suffer a lot, I have to take all decisions by myself and I’m scared. I have no one to talk to and I do not know if what I am doing is good or wrong. Nevertheless, everything will be just fine in a little while because my boyfriend is coming home for the winter holidays. I talk to him a lot”. The discussions with a teacher whom an interviewed girl trusts highlighted that ,,when her parents are not at home she’s taking care of the household by herself and her grandmother cannot help her as she lives in another part of the village. Sometimes at night, Natalia hears voices and sees shadows and when that happens she covers her head with the blanket and tries to fall asleep again”. The effects caused by the separation from their parents are alarming and prove the intense negative experiences that children of migrant parents are going through, experiences that influence considerably children’s mental health. It can be asserted that the absence of a mother is tolerated less by a growing child and has long-term consequences. The results of the study stress frequent child abuse cases. Even if the neglect and emotional abuse cause severe damage to the mental and personality development of a child these types of abuse are being tolerated or justified by the absence of parents, their poor situation, situational behaviour, etc. Still, according to the results of the study some children left behind experience physical and sexual abuse, and even suicide attempts. For instance one of the respondents had hidden this experience but noted that her dream is to “escape Moldova”. This can be explained by the transfer of her negative emotions towards the aggressor. Her tendency to move away from her aggressor was clarified during a discussion with her friend. The experiences of another respondent allowed us to reveal the mental traumas caused by sexual abuse. This case of incest highlighted the problem of a mother’s indifference towards her child who had previously gone through an experience of abuse; moreover she left her child in the care of her abuser, her stepfather. The girl, the victim of a sexual abuse misses her very much (see Box 7). 56
Psychological and social effects of migration BOX 6 Case Study. Suicide attempts among children with labour migrant parents (III_C_22) Her friend told us: ,,Maria committed two suicide attempts but she failed because the first time her rope broke and the second time I don’t remember what exactly happened. Why? Because her father is exploiting her, she has to work a lot, he often beats her. She has no time to rest because her father is used to come home at 2-3 am and he wakes her up and shouts at her, and in the morning he wakes her up to feed the animals and the poultry. When she’s asleep she often shudders and she’s very scared”. Below there is one of her messages that the girl sends to her friend–she often writes this kind of messages: ,,I would not wish for anybody else to have a life like mine. I cannot stand the pain and I cannot live with a fool like him. I am going crazy. I don’t want to live, nobody cares about me, and I’m all alone”. BOX 7 Case Study. Sexual abuse among children left behind by labour migrant parents (III_C_24) Elena, a 12 year old girl confessed to the interviewer: “It is so hard without my mother; when she’s near things go different. It is good that I found out that there are people who can take care of us. There are good and bad people… My life, if compared to other children’s life is determined by the presence of my mother and children’s attitude depends on the presence of their parents. When children have their mom near she can give them so much love (while she was talking about her mother she continuously cried)”. When did the abuse happen? “After 12 – 17 days that my mom left, that’s when I was sexually abused. It was after my birthday party. I told my aunt Ana, my brother, I spoke to mom on the phone, to aunt Maria, to my uncle”. Do you think that it was something planned? “I don’t know. But there was another abuse situation in 2008. My brother was at home and he told my mother everything he saw. My mom was about to leave, she gathered all her things to go but he convinced her to stay, and he said it will not happen again. My stepfather threatened me that if I tell anything he will be sent to prison”. What bothers you the most? What makes you feel unhappy? “There are things in my life that I find unpleasant as the presence of my stepfather. He is looking for us even now. One day, when I was going to school there was a man who started talking to me. He told me that he has a daughter in Italy and she sends him clothes and he can give me some, too. I understood that he was sent by my stepfather. He told me to go with him to the spring to show me something. I quickly entered the bus and I ran away. I told everything to my teacher and she told me that if it happens again I’d need to come to school accompanied by somebody from the Centre…”. 57
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SPECIFIC NEEDS OF CHILDREN AND ELDE
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CONTENTS Foreword .................
Page 5 and 6: Foreword quence of migration and in
Page 7 and 8: List of boxes List of boxes Box 1 B
Page 9 and 10: Executive summary elderly adjust to
Page 11 and 12: Executive summary • To develop fo
Page 13 and 14: Executive summary For private servi
Page 15 and 16: Executive summary - To offer inform
Page 17 and 18: Executive Introduction summary grat
Page 19 and 20: Methodology Executive Introduction
Page 21 and 22: Chapter I The lack of care and affe
Page 23 and 24: The perception of labour migration
Page 43 and 44: Psychological and social effects of
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Psychological and social effects of
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The perception Children’s of labo
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The health of family members The in
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The integrity of migrant families t
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The integrity of migrant families B
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The integrity of migrant families T
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The integrity of migrant families b
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The well-being of migrants’ house
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Values and life plans 1.7. Values a
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Values and life plans arrest shopli
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Values and life plans abroad as I d
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Values and life plans Extremely mar
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Chapter II Some children whose pare
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Normative aspects tection the child
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Normative aspects The legislation o
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Normative aspects Amongst the other
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Normative aspects Still providing p
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Policies and mechanisms existing on
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Mechanisms for coping with difficul
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Some children protest against the a
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Conclusions and recommendations (in
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Conclusions and recommendations sum
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Conclusions and recommendations inf
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Conclusions and recommendations - T
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Conclusions and recommendations - T
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Annexes Code Age Sex Residence envi
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Annexes Annex 4. Data on focus grou
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Annexes Annex 8. Certificate for th
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