Disserations by Mr. Dooley (1906) - Almanac of Theodore Roosevelt

Diplomatic Uniforms
mayne Tower, but his unyform remains upon th'
banks iv th' frozen Neva, an' against it nayether
arrystocratic inthrigue nor dispotic whim will pre-
vail.
" I think it's a good thing, Hinnissy. It's goin'
to save us a lot iv throuble in pickin' out diplomats.
It will no longer be nicissry to find some wan who
wudden't wurruk at home, an' whose rilitives wud like
to sind him out iv th' counthry to uphold th' dignity
an' honor iv our fair land abroad. All we have to
do is to get th' unyform an' thrust anny kind iv a
'
man into it. Th' Prisidint has disignated a pair
iv olive-green pantaloons an' a ecroo coat to be am-
bassadure exthraordhinry an' ministher plinipootinchry
iv th' United States at th' coort iv Saint
Jeems.'
'
Th' Hon'rable Caliphas Sniwy has been
promoted fr'm th' Hussars unyform
th' more important suit at Madhrid.'
at Lisbon to
' Th' demands
iv th' United States govermint on th' Impror iv Chiny
was prisinted yisterdah be a bear-skin cap, a bluean'-silver
coat, an' a pair iv yellow pantaloons. Th'
Impror was much imprissed.' It '11 be grand. Whin
th' Prisidint wants to find an imissary f'r an im-
portant missyon he'll call on a tailor. They'll be
signs in th' windies iv th' clothing stores :
*
Plymouth
Rock diplomats ; they niver tear.'
'
Nobby styles in
American ambassadures, fifteen dollars.' An' there
ye ar-re."
" Well, it must be thryin' f'r an ambassadure to
be took f'r a waiter," said Mr. Hennessy.
"
It is," said Mr.
"
Dooley. It is exthremely
annoyin' to a proud soul to be mistook f'r a waiter.
But I shud like to hear what th' waiters think about
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