Franken-Lies-And-the-Lying-Liars-Who-Tell

"Help! Help me!" Kerry recognized Limbaugh's voice from the radio. "The fuckers
shot me in the ear! I'm deaf! Oh, God, I'm deaf." Just then, Limbaugh stumbled out of the
darkness, collapsing mere yards from the canal.
Kerry leapt off the boat to help the bloated radioman. Limbaugh threw his arms
around the lieutenant's neck, almost pulling him to the ground. "Save me!" he cried pitiously.
"Oh God, please save me."
Kerry hoisted Limbaugh's enormous bulk across his back in a fireman's carry. Staggering
under the weight, he walked the last few feet to the boat and tossed him over the gunnels.
"Okay, you satisfied? Can we go now?" O'Reilly asked petulantly.
"Listen up, men. I need you to check your weapons. Then we're gonna split up into
two squads and engage the enemy. Now, we don't have a lot of ammo, so we're going to have
to use stealth and surprise. I'm taking you, you, you, and the guy who brought me the head.
Are there any questions?"
Bang! A single shot ripped through Kerry's spine, exiting out his chest. His knees
buckled; he was dead before he hit the deck.
Bush, his M-16 still smoking, grinned. "Yeah, I got a question. Anybody here see
that? I didn't think so."
"Well, I certainly did," Gore said indignantly. "And I plan to make a full-"
Bang!
As dawn broke over Vietnam, the party aboard Swift Boat PCF-73 was just getting into full
swing. The men were ebullient. They were going home, or at least to Saigon. So they
thought. It was only Stoner Will who noticed that the sun was rising on the wrong side of the
river. But he didn't care. He had heard about the hash in Cambodia, and he was eager to try it
out.
THE END