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The Book of Tells (Peter Collett)[unlocked]

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THE BOOK OF TELLS<br />

people, insults also serve other valuable psychological<br />

functions. One is to enrage the person who's under attack to<br />

the point where they engage in a hasty and ill-considered<br />

response that makes them look even more stupid. Another<br />

function is to increase one's own reputation as the originator<br />

<strong>of</strong> well-aimed, amusing and destructive remarks about other<br />

people.<br />

Political insults fall into several categories:<br />

• PARTY INSULTS. This category <strong>of</strong> insults is aimed at the<br />

opposition, rather than at individual politicians who<br />

represent the opposition. Typically they draw attention to<br />

the incompetence <strong>of</strong> the other party, like Winston<br />

Churchill's famous remark about the Labour Party: <strong>The</strong>y<br />

are not fit to manage a whelk stall.' Harold Macmillan's<br />

damning dismissal <strong>of</strong> the Liberal Party also falls into this<br />

category: 'As usual the Liberals <strong>of</strong>fer a mixture <strong>of</strong> sound<br />

and original ideas. Unfortunately none <strong>of</strong> the sound ideas<br />

are original and none <strong>of</strong> the original ideas are sound.'<br />

• COLD INSULTS. <strong>The</strong> purpose <strong>of</strong> these insults is to make<br />

someone appear cold and unemotional. Referring to Robert<br />

Peel, Benjamin Disraeli said, '<strong>The</strong> Right Honourable<br />

gentleman is reminiscent <strong>of</strong> a poker. <strong>The</strong> only difference is<br />

that a poker gives <strong>of</strong>f the occasional signs <strong>of</strong> warmth.'<br />

• EMASCULATING INSULTS. <strong>The</strong>se, <strong>of</strong> course, are<br />

designed to undermine someone's masculinity. Prime<br />

Minister Lloyd George, for example, once said <strong>of</strong> Herbert<br />

Samuel, the Liberal politician, 'When they circumcised<br />

Herbert Samuel they threw away the wrong bit.'<br />

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