The Book of Tells (Peter Collett)[unlocked]

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THE BOOK OF TELLS pre-emptive property of gestures shows that our thoughts can influence our actions before they inspire what we say - or, more controversially, that our gestures may actually shape what we think and say. On those occasions when we have trouble remembering a word, it's often only by performing the appropriate gesture that we can recover the word from memory. There are other, equally revealing examples of timeshifted tells. George Mahl, a clinical psychologist, described an interview with one of his patients in which the woman was playing with her wedding ring while she was describing her symptoms. During this time she made no mention of her husband. It was only after she had stopped fiddling with her wedding ring that she started to complain about her husband, saying that he didn't help her round the house and that he made her feel inadequate. 9 There are two ways to understand what's happening when the woman plays with her wedding ring - either she had an unconscious image of her husband at the time, or it was the act of playing with her ring that brought her husband to mind and prompted her to complain about him. Either way, it's clear that while she was playing with the ring she was not consciously thinking about her husband - that only came later. Her manipulation of the ring is therefore transposed in time - it's a time-shifted tell. On the other hand, if we were to regard her complaint about her husband as a tell, we would consider it to be a time-locked tell, because it reveals what she was thinking about at that moment. 30
TELLS Predictive Tells Some tells are predictive - they show what someone is about to do next or how a confrontation is likely to end. Imagine a situation where a young man and woman are talking to each other on a park bench, and she decides that it's time for her to leave. She doesn't just get to her feet, announce that she's leaving, and then disappear. Instead she does things by stages. To ensure that she doesn't upset the man, she starts by producing a series of 'intention movements', to show him that she's thinking of leaving. These may consist of tiny adjustments to her gaze or the way she arranges her arms and legs. The important point about these intention displays is that they aren't necessarily conscious, and the woman may not even be aware that she's producing them. Although the woman's signals are very subtle, the man is likely to pick them up and to alter his own posture accordingly. By responding to her displays and producing his own, he's able to show that he's understood her intentions. He may be unaware of the effect that her signals are having on him, and how he is responding - in fact the entire dialogue of leaving tells may be played out without either of them being conscious of what's happening. There are other instances where people respond to tells without being aware of what's happening. When two people are talking to each other it's not uncommon for one or both of them to 'mirror' the posture of the other. One person may, for example, cross her legs and then turn her face, and a few minutes later her friend may perform exactly the same actions. 10 When we mimic other people's actions in this way we are usually oblivious of our 31
Page 2 and 3: AS SEEN ON TV Fell is an action tha
Page 4 and 5: Also by Peter Collett Foreign Bodie
Page 6 and 7: THE BOOK OF TELLS A BANTAM BOOK: 0
Page 8 and 9: Contents Acknowledgements 1 Tells 2
Page 10 and 11: Spiecker, Martine Stewart, Michael
Page 12 and 13: THE BOOK OF TELLS purpose other tha
Page 14 and 15: THE BOOK OF TELLS lay false trails.
Page 16 and 17: THE BOOK OF TELLS recognize as tell
Page 18 and 19: THE BOOK OF TELLS often identify th
Page 20 and 21: THE BOOK OF TELLS look out for micr
Page 22 and 23: THE BOOK OF TELLS Similarly, when w
Page 24 and 25: THE BOOK OF TELLS Counterfeit tells
Page 26 and 27: THE BOOK OF TELLS sign of helplessn
Page 28 and 29: THE BOOK OF TELLS reasonably assume
Page 32 and 33: THE BOOK OF TELLS own actions - it'
Page 34 and 35: THE BOOK OF TELLS don't even know t
Page 36 and 37: 2. Dominant Tells When we meet peop
Page 38 and 39: THE BOOK OF TELLS of the need to 'r
Page 40 and 41: THE BOOK OF TELLS about how importa
Page 42 and 43: THE BOOK OF TELLS stance than women
Page 44 and 45: THE BOOK OF TELLS the 'crotch-yank'
Page 46 and 47: THE BOOK OF TELLS Because they conv
Page 48 and 49: THE BOOK OF TELLS one where the int
Page 50 and 51: THE BOOK OF TELLS Superficially all
Page 52 and 53: THE BOOK OF TELLS much more likely
Page 54 and 55: THE BOOK OF TELLS how the eyes are
Page 56 and 57: THE BOOK OF TELLS an air of perpetu
Page 58 and 59: THE BOOK OF TELLS Yawning Tells Eve
Page 60 and 61: THE BOOK OF TELLS adult males than
Page 62 and 63: THE BOOK OF TELLS speech style so a
Page 64 and 65: THE BOOK OF TELLS attempting to be
Page 66 and 67: THE BOOK OF TELLS Looking round the
Page 68 and 69: THE BOOK OF TELLS talkative and inf
Page 70 and 71: THE BOOK OF TELLS things that appea
Page 72 and 73: THE BOOK OF TELLS elongated and the
Page 74 and 75: THE BOOK OF TELLS appeasement. Cons
Page 76 and 77: THE BOOK OF TELLS reduces the threa
Page 78 and 79: THE BOOK OF TELLS substitution tell
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Head Tells Charle
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to identify how t
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to find ways of l
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THE BOOK OF TELLS lifting the visor
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THE BOOK OF TELLS completed what he
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THE BOOK OF TELLS point out that wh
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THE BOOK OF TELLS the resulting exp
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THE BOOK OF TELLS opinions about bl
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THE BOOK OF TELLS unexpected and un
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THE BOOK OF TELLS several minutes,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS true, boss, you w
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • SIMPLIFYING.
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4. Conversation Tells The most obvi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS As we saw in the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS you started talki
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talk. Interrupter
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to eliminate the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS a way that minimi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS the speaker does
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THE BOOK OF TELLS 'place-dropping'
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Before you've had
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THE BOOK OF TELLS used to show that
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THE BOOK OF TELLS THE STRADDLE STAN
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THE BOOK OF TELLS movement to depar
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THE BOOK OF TELLS when you consider
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Hair Tells One of
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THE BOOK OF TELLS up the stairs so
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THE BOOK OF TELLS people's behaviou
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THE BOOK OF TELLS also come from th
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THE BOOK OF TELLS distinguishes the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS necessarily sound
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THE BOOK OF TELLS reflects the temp
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Adulation Tells A
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THE BOOK OF TELLS The Adoring Wife
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Iconic Hand Gestu
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THE BOOK OF TELLS of tearing into o
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THE BOOK OF TELLS people, insults a
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Insults are the E
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THE BOOK OF TELLS deciding in advan
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THE BOOK OF TELLS - it's far better
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Political intervi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS 'negative back-ch
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Transition Tells
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THE BOOK OF TELLS convey messages o
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THE BOOK OF TELLS include, who cont
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THE BOOK OF TELLS other person for
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THE BOOK OF TELLS hand is below, in
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talking and smili
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THE BOOK OF TELLS friendly. Kennedy
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THE BOOK OF TELLS trying to figure
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THE BOOK OF TELLS arm round the oth
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THE BOOK OF TELLS woman he knows an
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THE BOOK OF TELLS kisses were not t
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • VOCALIZED KIS
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Another strategy
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THE BOOK OF TELLS woman realizes th
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THE BOOK OF TELLS not because they
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THE BOOK OF TELLS competing with ea
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7. Royal Tells On a state visit to
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Elizabeth, the Qu
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THE BOOK OF TELLS idea that laughte
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Queen usually ado
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • THE HANDBAG.
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THE BOOK OF TELLS superiors. Touch,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to shake hands, a
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THE BOOK OF TELLS than any other wa
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THE BOOK OF TELLS cuff. This is Cha
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talking to people
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THE BOOK OF TELLS - someone who was
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THE BOOK OF TELLS action occurs whe
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THE BOOK OF TELLS have high levels
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THE BOOK OF TELLS People can detect
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THE BOOK OF TELLS anxious and despo
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THE BOOK OF TELLS his keys it shows
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THE BOOK OF TELLS activities' which
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THE BOOK OF TELLS By covering their
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THE BOOK OF TELLS ANXIETY TELLS 232
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ANXIETY TELLS suddenly, to last lon
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ANXIETY TELLS the amount of time th
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ANXIETY TELLS being noticed, but be
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ANXIETY TELLS linguists call 'funda
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ANXIETY TELLS as to their desire to
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SEXUAL TELLS 'primary sexual charac
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SEXUAL TELLS between courtship sign
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SEXUAL TELLS animated, while the ma
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SEXUAL TELLS • SCANNING. People m
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SEXUAL TELLS are in the middle of t
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SEXUAL TELLS attractive man she can
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SEXUAL TELLS Flirting Tells Flirtin
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SEXUAL TELLS Leg Tells Women also t
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SEXUAL TELLS The last time I saw th
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SEXUAL TELLS the way that young peo
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SEXUAL TELLS been recognized. Writi
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SEXUAL TELLS the sixteenth century,
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SEXUAL TELLS Touching Tells Courtsh
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SEXUAL TELLS watch Hugh Grant on sc
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SEXUAL TELLS voice is big and muscu
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SEXUAL TELLS were keen to get toget
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SEXUAL TELLS have shown that people
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SEXUAL TELLS In contrast to the sig
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SEXUAL TELLS don't have the resourc
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SEXUAL TELLS mean anything. The oth
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LYING TELLS when they're given a pr
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LYING TELLS in their ability to det
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LYING TELLS • MULTIPLE CAUSES. Pe
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LYING TELLS speed up. In this kind
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LYING TELLS There is, however, a su
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LYING TELLS The Mouth-cover is an i
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LYING TELLS Smiling Tells Of all th
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LYING TELLS Micro-tells When people
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LYING TELLS the eyes bulging and th
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LYING TELLS SMOKESCREENS. Liars oft
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LYING TELLS work involved in produc
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11. Foreign Tells When people speak
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FOREIGN TELLS Action Tells Shibbole
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FOREIGN TELLS with a very light gri
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FOREIGN TELLS around. If he's serio
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FOREIGN TELLS side of the mouth are
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FOREIGN TELLS always talking, wheth
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FOREIGN TELLS Conversation Tells. I
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FOREIGN TELLS distance, simply by o
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FOREIGN TELLS expansive movements,
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FOREIGN TELLS 'Take two!' or 'Go ha
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FOREIGN TELLS more gesturally expre
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SMOKING TELLS us a great deal about
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SMOKING TELLS differ - most notably
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SMOKING TELLS The 'straight-leg hol
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SMOKING TELLS Gender is displayed i
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SMOKING TELLS There are several rea
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SMOKING TELLS smoke around her face
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SMOKING TELLS waving his cigarette
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SMOKING TELLS cigarette and being w
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SMOKING TELLS smoking simply provid
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13. Tell-tales You're going to work
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TELL-TALES present man behind in hi
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TELL-TALES host greeted you effusiv
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TELL-TALES allowing them instead to
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TELL-TALES chapters have shown that
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Notes 1. Tells 1 Caro, M. (1994) Th
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NOTES 5 Tremblay, R. E., Schaal, B.
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NOTES 27 Henley, N. (2001) 'Body po
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NOTES Human Facial Expression, edit
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NOTES 9 Duncan, S. (1972) 'Some sig
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NOTES 12 Schegloff, E. A. (1989) 'F
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NOTES Instrumentation, 1, 203-7; Be
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NOTES female attractiveness and des
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NOTES Therapy, 15(4), 271-82. 28 Pe
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NOTES salespersons and customers be
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NOTES 8 Zeldin, T. (1988) The Frenc
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NOTES effects of cigarette smoking
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Atkinson, Max, Ou
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THE BOOK OF TELLS compatibility 276
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THE BOOK OF TELLS flattery 99-103 f
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Hitler, Adolf 26,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS men sexual signal
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THE BOOK OF TELLS relaxation 46, 69
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THE BOOK OF TELLS thighs, pressed t
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