The Book of Tells (Peter Collett)[unlocked]

TELL-TALES
host greeted you effusively, you'd want to know whether
you'd been singled out or if everyone was getting the
same treatment. To find out, you'd need to watch how he
greeted the other guests - in other words, you'd have to
compare him with himself. That way you'd be able to find
out whether your host was especially pleased to see you,
or whether he's equally enthusiastic with everybody.
One reason why we're so blind to tells is that they seem so
small and insignificant. We're so busy concentrating on
what people are saying to us that we fail to notice their
choice of words, the inflection of their voice, and the way
they move their hands and feet. One of the most important
lessons to emerge from telleology is the fact that, where
tells are concerned, size doesn't matter. In fact, it's often
the tiny, almost imperceptible actions that provide clues to
people's thoughts and personality. This is most noticeable
in situations where people act unintentionally and where
they aren't aware of their actions. As Arthur Schopenhauer
pointed out, 'It is with trifles, and when he is off guard,
that a man best reveals his character.'
It was attention to detail that formed the basis of
Sherlock Holmes's legendary ability to understand
people's motives and to solve mysteries. 'You know my
method', said Holmes: 'it is founded upon the observance
of trifles.' His advice was 'Never to trust general impressions
- but concentrate upon the details'. 2 It's often in
the tiny tells and in the details of their unintended actions
that people are most revealing about themselves - in slips
of the tongue, minute hand movements, and the fleeting,
almost tachistoscopic micro-tells that flicker across their
face when they're trying to conceal their true feelings.
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