The Book of Tells (Peter Collett)[unlocked]

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THE BOOK OF TELLS to give him the benefit of the doubt and allow him to continue holding the floor. The floor-holding role of smoking was recognized by William Thackeray in the nineteenth century. 'Honest men with cigars in their mouths,' he observed, 'have great physical advantages in conversation. You may stop talking if you like - but the breaks of silence never seem disagreeable, being fuelled up by the puffing of smoke.' 8 Cigarettes also help to initiate conversations and consolidate relationships. Before smoking started to become unfashionable, cigarettes were often used to strike up a conversation - one person offered a cigarette and provided a light, the other accepted, and a bond of friendship and trust was immediately formed. Nowhere is this process more evident than in war, where cigarettes are the currency of comradeship and where smoking binds soldiers powerfully together. The act of offering a cigarette, both in this situation and elsewhere, is a very primitive gesture, not only because it represents a gift, but because it's Promethean - it's a gift of the distinctively human ability to make fire. The other reason why cigarettes bind people together is that they provide a way of modifying mood. As Richard Klein has pointed out, the gift of a cigarette is always a gift of composure. 9 It offers the person a means to relax, to take stock, and to obscure their worries in smoke. Personality Tells Cigarettes and cigars can be used aggressively. Watch a group of smokers and you'll often see a dominant person 340
SMOKING TELLS waving his cigarette around like a sword. Notice the 'rapier hold', where the cigarette is held between the thumb and forefinger, with the lit end facing away and the palm facing up. The fact that this posture makes smoking difficult provides an essential clue to its latent aggression; the fact that the cigarette is held like a rapier is another. When someone says something the smoker doesn't like, he can always 'parry' the remark by raising his cigarette - just as if he were physically blocking an attack. This can be followed by a 'thrust', where the lit end of the cigarette is aimed and then prodded at the head or chest of the other person. With a good aim and careful timing a verbal duel can often be settled with a cigarette or a cigar. When the other person isn't smoking it's usually no contest at all. The way people smoke is linked to other aspects of personality. Studies of smoking topography, for example, show that Type A individuals (people who are competitive and impatient) don't necessarily differ from Type B individuals (people who are co-operative and patient) in terms of the number of puffs or puff volume. But Type A individuals inhale the smoke for 70 per cent longer than Type Bs. 10 This enables Type As, who are more anxious, to calm themselves down. The way people exhale when they're in the company of others also provides valuable clues to their personality. 11 'Fronters', who blow the smoke forward, enclosing other people in it, tend to be dominant and aggressive. Then there are 'uppers', who exhale the smoke upwards and who tend to be considerate and confident. 'Downers', who blow the smoke downwards, are usually submissive and unassuming, rather like 'siders', who blow the smoke 341
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AS SEEN ON TV Fell is an action tha
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Also by Peter Collett Foreign Bodie
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THE BOOK OF TELLS A BANTAM BOOK: 0
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Contents Acknowledgements 1 Tells 2
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Spiecker, Martine Stewart, Michael
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THE BOOK OF TELLS purpose other tha
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THE BOOK OF TELLS lay false trails.
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THE BOOK OF TELLS recognize as tell
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THE BOOK OF TELLS often identify th
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THE BOOK OF TELLS look out for micr
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Similarly, when w
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Counterfeit tells
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THE BOOK OF TELLS sign of helplessn
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THE BOOK OF TELLS reasonably assume
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THE BOOK OF TELLS pre-emptive prope
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THE BOOK OF TELLS own actions - it'
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THE BOOK OF TELLS don't even know t
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2. Dominant Tells When we meet peop
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THE BOOK OF TELLS of the need to 'r
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THE BOOK OF TELLS about how importa
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THE BOOK OF TELLS stance than women
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THE BOOK OF TELLS the 'crotch-yank'
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Because they conv
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THE BOOK OF TELLS one where the int
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Superficially all
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THE BOOK OF TELLS much more likely
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THE BOOK OF TELLS how the eyes are
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THE BOOK OF TELLS an air of perpetu
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Yawning Tells Eve
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THE BOOK OF TELLS adult males than
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THE BOOK OF TELLS speech style so a
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THE BOOK OF TELLS attempting to be
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Looking round the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talkative and inf
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THE BOOK OF TELLS things that appea
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THE BOOK OF TELLS elongated and the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS appeasement. Cons
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THE BOOK OF TELLS reduces the threa
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THE BOOK OF TELLS substitution tell
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Head Tells Charle
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to identify how t
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to find ways of l
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THE BOOK OF TELLS lifting the visor
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THE BOOK OF TELLS completed what he
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THE BOOK OF TELLS point out that wh
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THE BOOK OF TELLS the resulting exp
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THE BOOK OF TELLS opinions about bl
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THE BOOK OF TELLS unexpected and un
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THE BOOK OF TELLS several minutes,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS true, boss, you w
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • SIMPLIFYING.
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4. Conversation Tells The most obvi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS As we saw in the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS you started talki
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talk. Interrupter
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to eliminate the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS a way that minimi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS the speaker does
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THE BOOK OF TELLS 'place-dropping'
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Before you've had
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THE BOOK OF TELLS used to show that
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THE BOOK OF TELLS THE STRADDLE STAN
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THE BOOK OF TELLS movement to depar
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THE BOOK OF TELLS when you consider
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Hair Tells One of
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THE BOOK OF TELLS up the stairs so
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THE BOOK OF TELLS people's behaviou
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THE BOOK OF TELLS also come from th
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THE BOOK OF TELLS distinguishes the
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THE BOOK OF TELLS necessarily sound
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THE BOOK OF TELLS reflects the temp
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Adulation Tells A
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THE BOOK OF TELLS The Adoring Wife
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Iconic Hand Gestu
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THE BOOK OF TELLS of tearing into o
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THE BOOK OF TELLS people, insults a
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Insults are the E
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THE BOOK OF TELLS deciding in advan
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THE BOOK OF TELLS - it's far better
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Political intervi
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THE BOOK OF TELLS 'negative back-ch
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Transition Tells
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THE BOOK OF TELLS convey messages o
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THE BOOK OF TELLS include, who cont
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THE BOOK OF TELLS other person for
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THE BOOK OF TELLS hand is below, in
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talking and smili
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THE BOOK OF TELLS friendly. Kennedy
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THE BOOK OF TELLS trying to figure
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THE BOOK OF TELLS arm round the oth
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THE BOOK OF TELLS woman he knows an
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THE BOOK OF TELLS kisses were not t
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • VOCALIZED KIS
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Another strategy
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THE BOOK OF TELLS woman realizes th
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THE BOOK OF TELLS not because they
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THE BOOK OF TELLS competing with ea
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7. Royal Tells On a state visit to
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Elizabeth, the Qu
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THE BOOK OF TELLS idea that laughte
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THE BOOK OF TELLS Queen usually ado
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THE BOOK OF TELLS • THE HANDBAG.
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THE BOOK OF TELLS superiors. Touch,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS to shake hands, a
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THE BOOK OF TELLS than any other wa
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THE BOOK OF TELLS cuff. This is Cha
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THE BOOK OF TELLS talking to people
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THE BOOK OF TELLS - someone who was
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THE BOOK OF TELLS action occurs whe
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THE BOOK OF TELLS have high levels
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THE BOOK OF TELLS People can detect
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THE BOOK OF TELLS anxious and despo
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THE BOOK OF TELLS his keys it shows
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THE BOOK OF TELLS activities' which
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THE BOOK OF TELLS By covering their
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THE BOOK OF TELLS ANXIETY TELLS 232
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ANXIETY TELLS suddenly, to last lon
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ANXIETY TELLS the amount of time th
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ANXIETY TELLS being noticed, but be
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ANXIETY TELLS linguists call 'funda
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ANXIETY TELLS as to their desire to
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SEXUAL TELLS 'primary sexual charac
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SEXUAL TELLS between courtship sign
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SEXUAL TELLS animated, while the ma
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SEXUAL TELLS • SCANNING. People m
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SEXUAL TELLS are in the middle of t
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SEXUAL TELLS attractive man she can
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SEXUAL TELLS Flirting Tells Flirtin
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SEXUAL TELLS Leg Tells Women also t
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SEXUAL TELLS The last time I saw th
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SEXUAL TELLS the way that young peo
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SEXUAL TELLS been recognized. Writi
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SEXUAL TELLS the sixteenth century,
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SEXUAL TELLS Touching Tells Courtsh
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SEXUAL TELLS watch Hugh Grant on sc
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SEXUAL TELLS voice is big and muscu
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SEXUAL TELLS were keen to get toget
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SEXUAL TELLS have shown that people
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SEXUAL TELLS In contrast to the sig
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SEXUAL TELLS don't have the resourc
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SEXUAL TELLS mean anything. The oth
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LYING TELLS when they're given a pr
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LYING TELLS in their ability to det
Page 289 and 290: LYING TELLS • MULTIPLE CAUSES. Pe
Page 291 and 292: LYING TELLS speed up. In this kind
Page 293 and 294: LYING TELLS There is, however, a su
Page 295 and 296: LYING TELLS The Mouth-cover is an i
Page 297 and 298: LYING TELLS Smiling Tells Of all th
Page 299 and 300: LYING TELLS Micro-tells When people
Page 301 and 302: LYING TELLS the eyes bulging and th
Page 303 and 304: LYING TELLS SMOKESCREENS. Liars oft
Page 305 and 306: LYING TELLS work involved in produc
Page 307 and 308: 11. Foreign Tells When people speak
Page 309 and 310: FOREIGN TELLS Action Tells Shibbole
Page 311 and 312: FOREIGN TELLS with a very light gri
Page 313 and 314: FOREIGN TELLS around. If he's serio
Page 315 and 316: FOREIGN TELLS side of the mouth are
Page 317 and 318: FOREIGN TELLS always talking, wheth
Page 319 and 320: FOREIGN TELLS Conversation Tells. I
Page 321 and 322: FOREIGN TELLS distance, simply by o
Page 323 and 324: FOREIGN TELLS expansive movements,
Page 325 and 326: FOREIGN TELLS 'Take two!' or 'Go ha
Page 327 and 328: FOREIGN TELLS more gesturally expre
Page 329 and 330: SMOKING TELLS us a great deal about
Page 331 and 332: SMOKING TELLS differ - most notably
Page 333 and 334: SMOKING TELLS The 'straight-leg hol
Page 335 and 336: SMOKING TELLS Gender is displayed i
Page 337 and 338: SMOKING TELLS There are several rea
Page 339: SMOKING TELLS smoke around her face
Page 343 and 344: SMOKING TELLS cigarette and being w
Page 345 and 346: SMOKING TELLS smoking simply provid
Page 347 and 348: 13. Tell-tales You're going to work
Page 349 and 350: TELL-TALES present man behind in hi
Page 351 and 352: TELL-TALES host greeted you effusiv
Page 353 and 354: TELL-TALES allowing them instead to
Page 355 and 356: TELL-TALES chapters have shown that
Page 357 and 358: Notes 1. Tells 1 Caro, M. (1994) Th
Page 359 and 360: NOTES 5 Tremblay, R. E., Schaal, B.
Page 361 and 362: NOTES 27 Henley, N. (2001) 'Body po
Page 363 and 364: NOTES Human Facial Expression, edit
Page 365 and 366: NOTES 9 Duncan, S. (1972) 'Some sig
Page 367 and 368: NOTES 12 Schegloff, E. A. (1989) 'F
Page 369 and 370: NOTES Instrumentation, 1, 203-7; Be
Page 371 and 372: NOTES female attractiveness and des
Page 373 and 374: NOTES Therapy, 15(4), 271-82. 28 Pe
Page 375 and 376: NOTES salespersons and customers be
Page 377 and 378: NOTES 8 Zeldin, T. (1988) The Frenc
Page 379: NOTES effects of cigarette smoking
Page 382 and 383: THE BOOK OF TELLS Atkinson, Max, Ou
Page 384 and 385: THE BOOK OF TELLS compatibility 276
Page 386 and 387: THE BOOK OF TELLS flattery 99-103 f
Page 388 and 389: THE BOOK OF TELLS Hitler, Adolf 26,
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THE BOOK OF TELLS men sexual signal
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THE BOOK OF TELLS relaxation 46, 69
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THE BOOK OF TELLS thighs, pressed t
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