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MAKE YOUR CHILD A LEADER
The group of girls, on a picnic had taken
a wrong trail. Now, after a terrifying night, they
were wandering hopelessly – cold, wet and
hungry. ,,They’ll never find us,’’ one girl said
between sobs. ,,We’re all going to die.’’
Then, an 11-year old Evanell Towne
stepped forward. ,,I’m not going to die,’’ she
said firmly. ,,I’ve heard that if you follow a little
stream, it empties into a bigger stream and
finally you come to a town. I’m going to follow
that stream we saw. The rest of you can come if
you want.’’
Evanell plunged resolutely into the
woods, the others followed. They walked for
over five hours, but finally, they heard voices,
and their shouts brought the rescue party. The
spunky youngster had led the group to safety.
’’A born leader,’’ people say when Irecount
this story. In their view, people like
Evanell are programmed at birth to lead, while
others are destined to follow.
But my work has convinced me that
leaders aren’t born – they’re made. Men and
women who run organizations, lead the community
and captain sports teams are the product
of conscientious parents who follow simple
rules that foster a leadership mentality
– strength of mind and independent thinking.
How can you foster a leadership mentality?
Here are eight secrets.
0. D (przyk³ad) Confidence comes from being
told,,,Iknowyoucandoit!’’Andthen,,,Youdid
it! Terrific’’ Building confidence begins with the
child’s first steps. When he toddles triumphantly
toward your embrace, he has scored Victory No.
1. Each subsequent little success leads to others.
No success is too tiny to be complimented.
But this doesn’t mean you should fill the
air with insincere hurrahs, or that you should
never criticise. Criticism, however, should be
coupled with both praise and instruction.
1. One spring day Iwatched a girl in my
neighbourhood dig a rock out of her rain-soaked
front yard. She ran to her father ,,Daddy!
Look at this beautiful stone Ifound!’’ He looked
at her disapprovingly: ,,You’re getting all
muddy!’’ Her face fell. She threw the prize
away unhappily and trudged indoors.
What might he have said? How about,
,,What a beautiful stone! Let’s clean it up so we
can really see it.’’ After all, mud can be washed
away; the mark on the child’s imagination lasts
longer. Children (and adults too) admire and
follow someone who is willing to rise to challenges.
Yet all too often we teach our children
to play it safe.
2. Recently, a promising 12-year-old gymnast
came to me for help. She had all the skills of
a future Olympic medallist, yet never seemed
to live up to her potential. Ihanded her four
darts and told her to toss them at a target
across my office. She looked at me nervously.
,,What if Imiss?’’ she asked. Those four words
summed up her disappointing career. Instead
of focusing on how to achieve the goal, she
worried about how to keep from failing.
Persuade your child to think about
achievements rather than obstacles. The person
who inspires others is the one who rises to the
occasion even though he or she might fail.
3. Your daughter comes home and announces
she wants to be a professional bullfighter.
Or your son says he’s going to be a movie stunt
man. Neither squares exactly with the future
you had in mind for them. Don’t throw cold
water on them. Chances are the wannabe toreador
will change her mind and study law, and
the daredevil will detour into a business career.
Meanwhile, encourage their dreams, however
outlandish they seem to you.. What counts is
the ability to fantasize, and to think about what
might make the fantasies come true.
A leader has been described as one who
can have a vision, explain it to others and
influence them to follow his path to it. But the
first step is the dream itself.
4. On a playground near my house, Iwatched
a little boy whose legs were too short to
climb the first step of a slide. He ran to his
mother. But instead of boosting him onto the
step, she asked, ,,How could you reach it?’’
The boy thought for a minute. ,,What if Ipulled
my wagon over there and stand on it?’’ ,,Do
it,’’ she said. He did. The rest was easy.
’’Possibility thinking’’ is a trademark of
leadership. Those who examine a problem and
show others how to solve it invariably lead the
way.
5. Leadership needs to be sharpened by prac-
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