Peacebuilding &conflict transformation A ... - Peaceworkafrica

9. Effective communicationSome ideas on how to make communication more effective:Be explicit & clear Speaking clearly and explicitly makes the whole message meaningfuland makes it unnecessary for the receiver to speculate about what issaid or wanted. It also enables the listener(s) to understand what the sender isexpressing; it conveys honesty and openness, which in turn supports effectivecommunication. Speaking clearly presupposes good self‐knowledge: one mustbe clear to oneself to be clear to others. A process of self‐reflection to clarifyone’s own feelings, honest expectations and inner message will enable thesender to say what they want to say and what they want other(s) to hear.Concreteness The ability to speak in a manner that is straightforward and uncomplicated.This means applying a style of speaking that is open, honest and inline with inner beliefs and real emotions.Convey I message Talking in the first person singular means accepting responsibilityfor what one says, being direct and unambiguous in one’s expression; itmeans talking about one’s own wishes, needs and interests, as well as acknowledgingone’s own feelings and opinions. Making statements in the first personsingular also incorporates an authentic speaking style that expresses real emotionsand avoids making generalizations.Not “impersonal or you” message“We all know that…”“Everyone says that…”“It’s always the same…”“I” message instead“I know that…”“I would like to know…”“I worry about…”“I’m not sure if I understood you correctlywhen you…”Respect The underlying attitude is all‐important: if the speaker feels respect forothers as well as for her/himself and expresses this respect in their tone ofvoice, the words used, the gestures and other body movements there is very littleroom for misunderstanding.74 I I . C O M M U N I C AT I O N