Comfortable Madness First PDF 4-13-18

Unconditional
I couldn’t make my legs work. The lights drilled directly
into my skull. Cars screamed loud and dangerous on the street
outside. What was I supposed to do? I closed my eyes.
Gid came and sat with me, dressed in king’s robes made of
light and lilies. He said nothing. Even here, his face was invisible
behind a livid smudge. I wanted to touch him. I had so many
questions, but my tongue was too swollen to speak. He just stared
at me and shook his head.
He rose and stood in the corner and for some reason I cried.
Tears burned my cheeks. I couldn’t breathe. I felt sick.
The room spun. Gid ran his finger along my spine. My
bones shuddered. I puked.
“You’re killing yourself,” he said.
I lie on the floor and felt his breath on my neck. How am I
going to get out of this? I closed my eyes. Somehow, I knew when
he left. I knew when I was alone. But only for a moment. Tayla
shook me.
“Jesus,” she said. “Are you okay?”
I opened my eyes. Vomit crusted my chest and belly. It
spread in a chunky pool over the carpet.
“Butter,” she said.
Her voice was tight with worry and anger. Nothing was
simple with Tayla.
“You need a shower,” she said.
I was too weak to move. Tayla lifted me.
“Come on,” she said.
The bathroom’s naked bulb blinded me. I fell again.
“Shit,” Tayla said.
I wanted to say something but how do you tell someone
about a dream that walks in the real world? Gid was right. I was
dying.