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2 months ago

Comfortable Madness First PDF 4-13-18

Promises Gid stared at

Promises Gid stared at me and I stared at him. “I’ll give you everything,” he said. “What is this?” I asked. The room was too large. The moon in the sky shouldn’t have been there but it was hanging cold and distant and indifferent. Purple shadows ate the echoes. Something vague and scary pressed down on me. I rose too fast, too hard into an endless sky. Everything tilted and the dream petered out. I lay in bed and listened to Tayla breathe. She opened her eyes and stared at me. “What’re you doing?” “Waiting,” I said. “Fuck.” She sat up and wrapped her arms around her knees. Wild hair flared around her head like a halo. Some of it stuck to her face, sweat wet and oily looking. “Something’s going to happen,” I said. It was. I could feel it coming. The air tasted of static and ozone. My hands wavered on my wrists. “Go back to sleep,” Tayla said and rolled away. I lay down and closed my eyes. Sleep teased me. Fragments of words spun through my head. Parts of a room. Faces and hands. Hints of movement prickled along the nerves. “Stop,” I said. Out of nowhere, Gid laughed.

Shit Follows Voices told me to run. If I went somewhere where no one knew me, maybe the voices would fade, and I’d be normal. If only for a day. “I want to go away,” I said. “Go away?” “You know,” I said. “Somewhere new.” Tayla sighed and steered around a silver CRV. A couple of older women sat in the front talking. They looked good together, like they had a history. I wondered if they were a couple. I wanted to know everything about them, but they fell away and Tayla turned toward home. “Nothing’s going to change,” she said. I nodded. “Shit follows,” she said. I knew it. I knew she hated me. I knew she was going to leave. I popped the door open. Asphalt sped by. Cars honked. Tayla swerved. “Jesus!” she shouted. She got to the curb, her fingers white on the wheel. “What the fuck?” she screamed. Jamming the car into park, she grabbed my arm, tight, too tight. I pulled. “Stop!” I yelled. “Butter, goddammit.” We wrestled for a moment, pulling and pushing. I had to get out. I had to get away. A wild, fiery fear filled me. I fought with the seatbelt latch. Tayla slapped at me, cussing and blocking my fists as I tried to punch her. She was going to kill me. She was going to hide the body in the woods and no one would ever see me again.