Becoming America - An Exploration of American Literature from Precolonial to Post-Revolution, 2018a

BECOMING AMERICA
REVOLUTIONARY AND EARLY NATIONAL PERIOD LITERATURE
JESSAMY goes o and returns.
JESSAMY
Sir, the colonel is gone out, and Jonathan his servant says that he is gone to stretch
his legs upon the Mall.—Stretch his legs! what an indelicacy of diction!
DIMPLE
Very well. Reach me my hat and sword. I’ll accost him there, in my way to Letitia’s,
as by accident; pretend to be struck by his person and address, and endeavour to
steal into his condence. Jessamy, I have no business for you at present. [Exit.
JESSAMY [taking up the book]
My master and I obtain our knowledge from the same source;—though, gad! I
think myself much the prettier fellow of the two. [Surveying himself in the glass.]
That was a brilliant thought, to insinuate that I folded my master’s letters for
him; the folding is so neat, that it does honour to the operator. I once intended
to have insinuated that I wrote his letters too; but that was before I saw them; it
won’t do now; no honour there, positively.—”Nothing looks more vulgar, [reading
aectedly] ordinary, and illiberal than ugly, uneven, and ragged nails; the ends
of which should be kept even and clean, not tipped with black, and cut in small
segments of circles.”—Segments of circles! surely my lord did not consider that he
wrote for the beaux. Segments of circles; what a crabbed term! Now I dare answer
that my master, with all his learning, does not know that this means, according
to the present mode, let the nails grow long, and then cut them o even at top.
[Laughing without.] Ha! that’s Jenny’s titter. I protest I despair of ever teaching
that girl to laugh; she has something so execrably natural in her laugh, that I declare
it absolutely discomposes my nerves. How came she into our house! [Calls.] Jenny!
Enter JENNY.
JESSAMY
Prythee, Jenny, don’t spoil your ne face with laughing.
Why, mustn’t I laugh, Mr. Jessamy?
JENNY
JESSAMY
You may smile, but, as my lord says, nothing can authorise a laugh.
JENNY
Well, but I can’t help laughing.—Have you seen him, Mr. Jessamy? ha, ha, ha!
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