INSIDE THE GURU'S GATE - Anpere

code of conduct. As he said, all hairs which come loose from combing should be collected
and burnt to ashes and not immersed in any river held sacred by Hindus. The
present Sikh Rahit Maryada, however, does not specify the ritual procedure of hair
disposal. The local discussion came to stand as an illustrative case in point of how
conflicting interpretations on proper conducts co-exist and are continually negotiated
in the lived religion. But even if Sikhs in this case displayed different opinions regarding
ceremonial procedures they still maintained that old hairs from combing should
be given as a return gift to God, whether this is accomplished through a consignment
to the water or the fire.
MARRIAGE
Perhaps the most celebrated ceremony in the Sikh social and cultural life is the wedding.
In Sikhism marriage (viah) is considered the basis of family and social life. Marriage
completes humans by fringing them into the formal status of a householder
which is also the ideal state for human’s spiritual quests. With the rural life forming
the backdrop, the Punjabi folklore ‒ poetry, songs and art ‒ often capture cultural
sentiments of marriage. The image of the young woman preparing her own dowry at
the spinning wheel is well-known to Punjabis, even if nostalgic themes like these do
not necessarily correspond to the contemporary social reality. Over the years marriage
practices in the Sikh community and the Punjab have been a privileged subject
among scholars. A monitoring of these studies display that the scholarly focus has
been directed at sociological aspects of marriage, such as family and kinship systems,
dowry, and changing generational attitudes towards marriage customs. 612
Globally the Sikh community today shares a standard wedding ceremony (Anand
karaj) which contracts a marriage. Surrounding this ceremony, however, lies a
whole labyrinth of customs and rites that do not stipulate a marriage but functions as
a cultural and social overlay to the wedding rite. While some of these ceremonies aim
to create and confirm new kinship ties between two families, others are said to bring
matriomonial luck and happiness. As the institution of marriage establishes culturally
approved relations for reproduction, the rich symbolism of weddings will allude to
royalty, fertility and prosperity. In the following I will provide an overview of some
common religious and cultural practices related to Sikh weddings at Varanasi.
BETROTHAL
Traditionally, marriages in the Punjabi society were formally settled by a betrothal
ceremony called mangna, (literally “to ask for”). The family of the bride usually approached
the groom’s family to stipulate a marriage agreement. The ceremony of
mangna was an affair of men and the elders in a village. Together with the barber, a
612
See e.g. Mathur 1964, Jaspal Singh 1966, Balwinderjeet Kaur 1967, Rajagopalan & Singh 1967,
Leaf 1972, Gheerdhyal Singh 1974, Parry 1979, Hershman 1981, Jyoti 1992.
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Published on www.anpere.net in May 2008