THE BOOK OF POEMS IN TWENTIETH-CENTURY ... - TopReferat

tenth, "Уроки Аббатиссы," the twentieth, "Еще Урок Аббатиссы," and the forty-third,
"Огненный Урок." 250
In "Уроки Аббатиссы," the abbess sets out three tasks for Lavinia. She first asks
her to draw a map of the heavens, but Lavinia has the Angel-Wolf do it for her, afraid to
test herself and face her own ignorance. The second task requires Lavinia to look at
herself from within as upon one crucified. Lavinia again fails, immediately imagining
stigmata, instead of experiencing true pain or love. In her aspiration to achieve and prove
her enlightenment, she in fact falls victim to this same desire for enlightenment, a typical
Buddhist trap. The Abbess is only satisfied with Lavinia's performance in the third task
in which she is told to travel in her mind to the Last Supper in Jerusalem. When asked if
she saw the Savior, Lavinia finally replies truthfully, expressing her inability to see Him:
«Его я не видала.
Нет, врать не буду. Стоило
Глаза поднять—их будто солнцем выжигало,
Шар золотой калил. Как ни старалась—
Его не видела, почти слепой осталась».
"I did not see him.
No, I will not lie. I only needed to
Raise my eyes—it was as if they were scorched by the sun,
The golden sphere roasted them. No matter how much I tried—
I did not see Him, I was left almost blind."
It is still early in Lavinia's journey toward Christ. She is still finding her way, learning
how to approach Him; she is just beginning to understand that this journey requires the
250 While this is the last of the Abbess's formal lessons, Lavinia receives instruction later in the book as
well. Having swallowed a needle in her soup, she rushes to a medical elder in the sixtieth poem,
"Старица." As treatment, the nun gives her both honey and advice: "[…] В обрезанное сердце льется
Жизнь,/Любовь и дух, и царствие, и сила,/А что-то колет—плюнь и веселись". ("[…] Into the
circumcised heart pours Life,/Love and spirit, and kingdom, and strength,/But if something pricks—spit
and rejoice.")
186