Hockenbury Discovering Psychology 5th txtbk

318 CHAPTER 8 Motivation and EmotionRichard believed he was capable of leadinga heterosexual life.Richard and Becky’s wedding was magnificent.And, yes, I was the best man.After the wedding, they decided to stay inFayetteville so that Richard could startgraduate school. The inevitable happenedless than a year later. Becky called me.“I’m driving to Tulsa tonight. Don,you’ve got to tell me what’s going on,”she said, her voice strained, shaking. And Idid, as gently as I could.Richard and Becky’s marriage wasannulled. In time, Becky recovered psychologically,remarried, and had two children.Her bitterness toward Richard softenedover the years. The last time we talked, sheseemed genuinely forgiving of Richard.For his part, Richard gave up trying to besomething he was not. Instead, he came togrips with his sexual orientation, moved toSan Francisco, and became a co-owner oftwo health clubs. True to form, Richardquickly became a respected and well-likedmember of San Francisco’s large gay community.He eventually met John, anaccountant, with whom he formed a longtermrelationship. But after Richard’s moveto San Francisco, our friendship faded.It was our 20-year high school reunionthat triggered Richard’s unexpected call.When I told him I simply did not have thetime to attend, he suggested stopping inTulsa on his way to the reunion to meetSandy and our daughter, Laura.So on a warm May evening, Richard,Sandy, and I drank some margaritas, ateChinese carryout, and talked untilmidnight. Just as I had expected, Sandywas quite taken with Richard. Indeed,Richard was a wonderful man—smart,funny, thoughtful, and sensitive. Laura,who was not quite 2 years old, was alsoenchanted by Richard. My only regretabout that evening is that I did not take apicture of Richard sitting on our back deckas Laura brought him first one toy, thenanother, then another. As it turned out, itwould be the last time I saw Richard.About a year after he visited us in Tulsa,Richard was killed in a hang-gliding accident.As he was soaring over the rockyCalifornia coast, Richard swerved to missan inexperienced flyer who crossed hispath in the air. Richard lost control ofhis hang glider and was killed on impactwhen he plummeted into the rockycoastline.A week later, more than 300 peoplecrowded into St. Mary’s Catholic Church inSioux City, where Richard had been analtar boy in his youth. The outpouring oflove and respect for Richard at the memorialservice was a testament to the remarkableman he was.What Richard’s story illustrates is thatwho we are in this life—our identity—isnot determined by any single characteristicor quality. Yes, Richard was gay, butthat’s not all Richard was, just as yoursexual orientation is not the only characteristicthat defines you or motivates yourbehavior. In this chapter, we’ll look at awide variety of factors that motivate ourbehavior, including sexuality, striving toachieve, and the emotions we experience.In the process, we’ll come back toRichard’s story.>> Introduction: Motivation and EmotionKey Theme• Motivation refers to the forces acting on or within an organism to initiateand direct behavior.Key Questions• What three characteristics are associated with motivation?• How is emotion related to the topic of motivation?“Something” energized Richard’s behavior, moving him not just to become anaccomplished diver and hang glider, but also to marry, attend college, divorce, andmove to San Francisco. For that matter, “something” inspired you to pick up thistext, so that you are reading these words right now. And, going a step further,“something” moved us to write these words.