A thesis submitted in partial fulfilment of - Etheses - Queen Margaret ...

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father… I found out in later life that she‟d had an abortion before I met her… I guess
she was easy… it sounds an awful thing to say, but she was an easy girlfriend to
have… so… I guess that‟s how I managed to get it off with her, if you know what I
mean… whatever the expression is… but my second marriage… where I got two
daughters… she was an older woman… thirteen years older than me… and... er…
she was easier to get along with… so once again, it‟s… no disrespect, but… erm…
she‟d also had a bad upbringing and early life… (l.1:596ff.)
The fact that Kevin married twice indicates his need for female contact, love and affection.
His lack of confidence in relating to girls or women was a result of his incarceration in
special school, during which time he was deprived of ordinary growing experiences. The
long-term impact of this deprivation on Kevin‟s marriages has not been positive:
My wife, she… in regard to doing the business with her… she said that once a
week was fine… so in the end I had two daughters… and… erm… as a result of
going to this school I wasn‟t even capable of relating to them… I mean, I didn‟t
really relate to them… you know, I was one of these men who should never have
been a father… because we‟d led a monasterial life… and I couldn‟t… erm… I‟d
never had a relationship with a girl, really… or anything like that… never mixed
with girls… and therefore a young girl to me was something I‟d never come
across… and when I had them on my own… it sort of made me… I didn‟t like the
thoughts I was having… so in the end I said I‟m going to have to leave home… I
eventually left home… and kept in touch… kept paying the mortgage… we
eventually… she said “Oh, I want a divorce” …we split up… (l.878ff.)
The negative self-image revealed in Kevin‟s perception that only „easy‟ girls were available
to him, is also evident in Ash‟s statement that:
I‟ve only had a few girlfriends… every girlfriend I‟ve had, they‟ve had something
wrong, or should I say „different‟… I think I should… they‟ve had mental health or
physical… I‟ve never had a girlfriend that‟s been in a job or been quotes „normal‟…
(l.1:951ff.)
The relentless representation of impairment as something „wrong‟ with people can eat away
at identity, spoiling the way in which the self is experienced, harming the way that disabled