SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

THE FUNNIEST THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SAID ABOUT GARDENING 119
14. Your grass clippings are:
(a) Taken up in bundles and shipped to the poor people in
India, who are jolly well grateful to have them.
(b) Carefully placed on the curbside each Monday in
clear plastic bags alongside the three Rubbermaid
snap-top trash cans on wheels and the blue recycling
box, which this week contained one copy of
National Geographic and a #2 plastic milk jug that
you rinsed out and flattened according to the
rules.
(c) Since you haven’t gotten around to
mowing the lawn in five or six weeks,
you don’t have any grass clippings. In
fact, you can’t even find the
lawnmower. Last time you looked, it
was out behind the doghouse.
(d) Left on the lawn or layered in
the compost pile, where they
belong.
(e) Oh, criminy, what now, another citation?