SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

Zucchini Zoo
Zucchini to Feed the Masses
by Bud Herron
The Japanese claim — and have claimed for years — that the answer to
feeding the ever-increasing world populace is the soybean. Others — the
Chinese and the Indians notably among them — say the solution is kelp, a
coarse brown seaweed.
My wife, Ann, on the other hand, is a champion of zucchini. She
maintains that Bartholomew County alone has enough zucchini to feed all
of South America, the Fiji Islands and half of Bavaria. Hawcreek
Township by itself has so much zucchini this year that you can hardly
walk through Elsbury’s Greenhouse without some total stranger jumping
out from behind a potted tree and forcing some into your shopping bag. I
took Ann to a movie last week and the ticket salesman tried to give me my
change from a $20 bill in zucchini.
I’m really not sure where all the zucchini has come from. I don’t
remember zucchini being around when I was a child growing up in Hope.