SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

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The Difference BetweenNon-Gardeners and GardenersObjects or eventsNon-gardenerperception or responseGardener perceptionor responseCompostVermin, filth, bubonicplaguePowerful potionFalling leaves A wasted weekend Fodder for compostRabbit Peter Rabbit Peter RaptorChipmunk Alvin, Chip, & Dale Underground metropolisSquirrel Fluffy tail, fun to feed Contortionist that destroysbirdfeeders while twisted intothe shape of a pretzel
THE FUNNIEST THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SAID ABOUT GARDENING 265Objects or eventsNon-gardenerperception or responseGardener perceptionor responseWild violets in thelawn5” tall front yardgrassTwo cubic yards ofclean, compostedcow manure“Horrors! Grab the weedkiller!”Shame, stay indoors, pulldown the shadesTwenty cubic yards offreshly dropped cowmanure“Hooray! Grab the camera.”Healthy, green grass at theperfect heightTwo cubic yards thatguarantee a great gardenHanging plants Décor Hanging cuttings, waiting tobe pluckedCar Status symbol Something used to haulplants and mulchPlastic plant Plant OxymoronSomeone planting arhododendron infull sunSomeone planting a plant Someone inflicting cruel andunusual punishmentSomeone wiring abonsaiSomeone inflicting crueland unusual punishmentA master artisan helping aplant reach perfection
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Also from QuipperyAnd more books on
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Quippery LLCFairfield, Iowa 52557 U
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TABLE OF CONTENTSIs Gardening For Y
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THE FUNNIEST THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SAI
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Is Gardening For You?One in three A
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Getting Startedfrom The OnionTips F
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Tools of the TiradeGardening requir
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Deciding What to PlantStarting your
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The Plant Passion Testfrom David Ho
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Insects and OtherInpestationsMosqui
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Page 219 and 220: Phallic Fungus:Getting Stinkhorn Ou
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Page 241 and 242: Zucchini ZooZucchini to Feed the Ma
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Return on InvestmentThe first tweet
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AcknowledgementsGreat thanks to the
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Also from QuipperyAnd more Quippery
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SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

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