SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

THE FUNNIEST THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SAID ABOUT GARDENING 31
The shovel
The shovel was originally used for shoving things around
on the ground so you didn’t have to bend over all the
time.
After a while folks realized it could also be used
for digging holes in the ground — the original
ground-breaking technology, you might say.
This saved a lot of wear and tear on fingers
and fingernails.
Digging holes was useful for
many things, like burying stuff you
don’t want folks to see — treasure,
bones, bodies, subways, etc.
Shovel safety tips —
• Shoveling is strenuous
exercise, so do some warm-up
exercises first — you don’t want to start cold.
• Place the shovel in front of you.
• Put one foot on it.
• Slowly lean forward.
• When you’re sure the shovel is “shovel ready,” go ahead and hand
it to the guy you’ve hired to do the work.