SEEDS & WEEDS: The Funniest Things People Have Said About GARDENING

Parsley, Sage,
Rosemary, & Rhyme
This poem is attributed to Lady Maconochie of Inverewe. Inverewe is a
botanical garden in the Scottish Highlands. She scorns visitors who make
off with plants and cuttings, pronouncing curses on their gardens.
The Gardener’s Curse
Awake, my muse, bring bell and book
To curse the hand that cuttings took.
May every sort of garden pest
His little plot of ground infest
Who stole the plants from Inverewe,
From Falkland Place, Grathes too.
Let caterpillars, capsid bugs,
Leafhoppers, thrips, all sorts of slugs,
Play havoc with his garden plot,
And a late frost destroy the lot.