internet humor about stalin netinalju stalinist - Eesti Rahvaluule

Netinalju Stalinist
«
FBI palkas korralikku mõrtsukat. Test ka vaja teha. Kutsuvad esimese kandidaadi
ja ütlevad sellele, et kõrvaltoas on tema abikaasa ja ta tuleb maha lasta. Mees ei saa
hakkama, visatakse välja. Teine kandidaat ka ei saa tulistatud oma naise pihta... Visatakse
välja... Kolmas võtab revolvri ja läheb teise tuppa. Bang... Bang... Kuus pauku.
Väike paus... Kohutav ragin ja madin... Mees tuleb ja küsib pahaselt: “Miks te
kohe ei võinud öelda, et seal paukpadrunid olid, pidin ta tooliga surnuks peksma...”
EST 2
«
FBI-s on konkurss uue agendi kohale. Sõelale on jäänud kolm meest ja ees on viimane
katse: kõrvaltoas on oma naine, kes tuleb maha lasta. Läheb esimene mees
sisse ja tuleb varsti tagasi – ei suutnud. Läheb teine mees sisse ja sama lugu. Läheb
kolmas mees sisse, kostab valang, siis kolin, mürtsud. Tuleb lõpuks välja ja ütleb:
“Oleksite võinud öelda, et paukpadrunid, ma oleks kohe taburetiga virutanud.”
EST 2
«
It is said that in old times being accepted in the Soviet Communist Party was no
easy matter, and it required passing hard exams and tests. ere was one of these
tests which was especially demanding and it was reserved to those young people
who showed the promise to form the true cream of the party. It is said that, however,
this special test was discontinued after it was passed by a young candidate
named Josif Stalin. e test consisted in giving to the candidate a gun loaded with
blanks (and, of course, the candidate did not know this, and believed the gun to fire
real bullets). en the candidate was told: “Look, in that room there is an enemy of
the people. Ask no questions, go in there and kill him or her.” As a further element
of the test the examiners had placed in the room the candidate’s mother. Of course,
the majority of candidates refused to shoot their own mother and so did not pass
the test. A few did manage to shoot the old lady, perhaps because they were truly
ruthless or perhaps because they were smart enough to imagine that the gun would
only fire blanks. But with the young Stalin things went a different way. e examiners
heard several shots, then a tremendous noise. en Stalin came out of the room
holding the gun and sayng: “Why the hell did you give me a gun that doesn’t work? I
had to kill her using a chair!”
ENG 1
Ugo Bardi, Stories about Stalin
http://www.unifi.it/unifi/surfchem/solid/bardi/sovietjokes.html
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