internet humor about stalin netinalju stalinist - Eesti Rahvaluule

Netinalju Stalinist
Grandpa: In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told
us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Dirk Gently (Holistic Detective): I’m not exactly sure why, but right now I’ve got a
horse in my bathroom.
Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken 2000, which will both cross roads
and balance your checkbook, though when it divides 3 by 2 it gets 1.4999999999.
M. C. Escher: at depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the
time.
George Orwell: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was
crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.
Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
Plato: For the greater good.
Aristotle: To actualize its potential.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.
B. F. Skinner: Because the external influences, which had pervaded its sensorium
from birth, had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross
roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.
Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken
found it necessary to cross the road.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the
chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?
e Sphinx: You tell me.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature.
Emily Dickenson: Because it could not stop for death.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn’t cross the road; it transcended it.
Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
Saddam Hussein: is was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Saddam Hussein #2: It is the Mother of all Chickens.
Roemello: What’s it to you?! I mean what is everybody’s infatuation with this innocent
little chicken crossing the road anyway? I don’t know why it crossed, but I
know where it ended up... mmmm... chicken...
Joseph Stalin: I don’t care. Catch it. I need its eggs to make my omelette.
Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes the chicken
crossed the road, but why it cross it, I’ve not been told!
O. J.: It didn’t. I was playing golf with it at the time.
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