OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

136
pitch black, and I couldn't see the man in the rear seat, as
anything more than an outline. I asked him where he was
headed.
"Mexico", he said, "I need to get out of town for a while".
I DEFINITELY knew that voice, but I couldn't quite place it.
The young girl in the back seat helped me out, though, when
she asked, "Hey, Bud, do we have any cigarettes left?"
I was gripped by horror. What kind of God would allow this to
happen? All I wanted was to cruise down to Nogales and pick
up some pulque, and I wound up being confronted by some
horrible freak from the no-so-distant past. For it WAS, in fact,
Bud, travelling the hard way with his newest teenage conquest.
"Fuck that", I thought...I'm NOT getting involved in anymore
redneck dramas. With any luck at all, Bud wouldn't recognize
me, and I could travel in peace. Just another two hours, and I'd
be rid of him.
At about this point, I cruised around a bend in the road, and
saw what appeared to be clouds in the road...all fluffy and
white. This odd sight had barely registered on my mind, when
we hit the first goat.
The air was filled with thudding noises, and the van rocked on
its chassis like it was about to flip over. Finally, everything
came to a stop.
I opened the door, and found myself ankle deep in goat bits.
The grill of the van was gone, and the radiator was covered in
wool and blood. The Judge staggered out of the passenger side,
ranting about assassins, and waving a great big goddamn pistol.
*BLAM*
or kill me