OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

140
himself Jose. Listening in, I realized that they were haggling a
trade...Jose was offering to trade his 1975 El Camino for Amy,
straight up.
I grabbed the Judge by the arm, and said (in English), "What
the fuck are you doing, you animal? You can't trade that child
for a car!"
He looked at me with a quizzical expression, and asked, "Why
not? It's MINT! That car is a classic!
I merely shook my head, and tried to block out the awful
mariachi music.
A short while later, Jorge walked in. Jorge and I go way
back...we both worked for the same cargo airline, but both of
us quit when the company took a contract in Iraq. Jorge walked
up and shook my hand, and said, "The case is out in my trunk,
amigo. You of course brought the $300?"
"$300??? You told me $150, you thieving bastard!"
"Well, my friend, the free market has forced my to adjust my
price. If this is too much for you, perhaps we can just forget
about it, and you can drive back to Arizona."
"Goddammit, you're KILLING me!" I yelled. Bad move.
Judge Richardson, who was face down on a card table, jumped
up screeching about assassins, and pulled that goddamn pistol
again. He was appallingly drunk, and waving it around.
Everyone else froze.
"Get the hell out of here", I whispered to Amy, "Things just
became complica..."
or kill me