OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

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43 "War on Drugs", Meese's "War on Pornography", and a million other "Wars on un-Christian Shennanigans", but we knew it couldn't last. The perpetrators were simply too old to carry on much longer, or too corrupt. And we were right: Reagan is a drooling vegetable, Big Ed Meese wound up on the wrong end of a driving range with the ghost of Spiro Agnew...and the greatest hammerhead of them all, John Wayne (known as a Real American Hero, because he beat the living sh*t out of everything he couldn't understand) is 6 feet under. What we failed to see was that they trained their successors well during their time in the wilderness, when the Big Dog was running the show, and doing truly spectacular things with cigars and plump young interns. The happy-go-lucky days of the Clinton Era are gone now, swept away by the events of both 911, and the Bush administrations' absolutely insane policies of supply-side voodoo economics and Gestapo organizations such as HSD. The fun is over, kids, and it ain't coming back anytime soon...nor is it intended to. Think about it: Why is Ashcroft chasing head shops (busting the likes of Tommy Chong in the process) over fricking marijuana while Al Qaeda regroups? Simple. They don't want to interfere with AQ's regrouping. AQ was good enough to come alonh on 911 and give Bush a mandate (try to remember what a joke he was BEF<strong>OR</strong>E 911). I am sure that Ashcroft is feeling confident that there will be another "event" just prior to the 2004 election...Which will, of course, be "suspended" due to the emergency. Are you ready for that? Are you ready for El Presidente for Life Bush? Are you ready for the death of the republic, liberty, and the bare possibility or kill me
44 that the fun might ever come back? Remember, friends, that the odious "PATRIOT Act was passed in October 2001, during the height of our national nervous breakdown. After ANOTHER such event, the Expanded Security Act of 2003 (aka: PATRIOT II) is a shoo-in. Say HELLLOOOOOO, secret arrests and warrantless searches, and GOODBYE to the 4th amendment. We have chain link compounds for freaks like you, and anyone who objects is OBVIOUSLY a terrorist sympathizer; just as anyone who objected to our little adventure in Iraq was instantly labelled a "Saddam-lover". And we have WAYS of dealing with sympathizers... Trust me on this; I know the face of Doom, for I am the Right Reverend Roger, Minister of Bubba's Salvation Church and Rib Shack(tm), and I speak directly with The Man. Hey, it worked for Oral Roberts... Or kill me. or kill me
Page 1 and 2: OR KILL ME!! Heresies, Rants, Sermo
Page 3 and 4: 2 CONTENTS PART ONE: Sermons 3 PART
Page 5 and 6: 4 Rev Roger Sermon #1: A rant/sermo
Page 7 and 8: 6 Rev Roger Sermon 2: Attack of the
Page 9 and 10: 8 Rev Roger sermon #3 ...get yer ba
Page 11 and 12: 10 But what of those brains? When's
Page 13 and 14: 12 supervisor, I caught an intervie
Page 15 and 16: 14 boy)...and it ISN'T GOING TO! No
Page 17 and 18: 16 Now, the money grubbing b@stards
Page 19 and 20: 18 transition will be easier. Hell,
Page 21 and 22: 20 his frickin' Gestapo, the proble
Page 23 and 24: 22 this: If you get out of line, we
Page 25 and 26: 24 you are no longer afraid of mist
Page 27 and 28: 26 Rev Roger Sermon #11: Land of th
Page 29 and 30: 28 Why the hell should they? They h
Page 31 and 32: 30 crazy-glueing the enter button (
Page 33 and 34: 32 that the battles of the 60s had
Page 35 and 36: 34 the descendants of slaves who ch
Page 37 and 38: 36 You could get on the internet an
Page 39 and 40: 38 Rev Roger Sermon#17 What have yo
Page 41 and 42: 40 legally) booger up the local ATF
Page 43: 42 Rev Roger Sermon #18: DOOM Origi
Page 47 and 48: 46 Grayfaces do not know they are d
Page 49 and 50: 48 Rev Roger Sermon #21: Leeetttts
Page 51 and 52: 50 Rev Roger Sermon #22: The Machin
Page 53 and 54: 52 So if you wish to have a plutocr
Page 55 and 56: 54 With Zevon gone, the most I can
Page 57 and 58: 56 trying...There will be NO revolu
Page 59 and 60: 58 Sermon #25: THE FINAL WORD Origi
Page 61 and 62: 60 4. Do I feel that I have the rig
Page 63 and 64: 62 Rev Roger Special Bonus Sermon #
Page 65 and 66: 64 the bottle, drop the dugout, and
Page 67 and 68: 66 anymore...but your parents ARE.
Page 69 and 70: 68 People are dragged out of line i
Page 71 and 72: 70 most nations, I seriously doubt
Page 73 and 74: 72 All these things I have seen, an
Page 75 and 76: 74 Word Game" or "What are you eati
Page 77 and 78: 76 The Good Rev Roger Sermon #33: T
Page 79 and 80: 78 That’s right, the television
Page 81 and 82: 80 passers by with your message…a
Page 83 and 84: 82 Sermon #34: Classified. φ or ki
Page 85 and 86: 84 He really DOES laugh at the GOP
Page 87 and 88: 86 Rev Roger: The Heresies, chapter
Page 89 and 90: 88 6. Free Radicals: A Free Radical
Page 91 and 92: 90 We are mutants. That's right, mu
Page 93 and 94: 92 Heresies 3: Classified. Ξ or ki
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94 Eris is the goddess of DISCORD.
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96 4. Latent Discordians - Discordi
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98 PART Three Millions of Screaming
Page 101 and 102:
100 By HAMZA HENDAWI, Associated Pr
Page 103 and 104:
102 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, p
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104 accomplishment. "See, Millie? T
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106 rednecks, Antabuse is a powerfu
Page 109 and 110:
108 "What kind of pussy do you thin
Page 111 and 112:
Page 113 and 114:
Page 115 and 116:
114 "I think I have the answer to t
Page 117 and 118:
116 seem to be without sin, so you
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118 Image: A run-down doublewide tr
Page 121 and 122:
120 Jim said, "Well, watch your bac
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Page 125 and 126:
Page 127 and 128:
126 Now, Bowzer has always been an
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128 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, P
Page 131 and 132:
130 I thought for a moment, and sai
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Page 135 and 136:
134 Cheryl slapped me, burst into t
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136 pitch black, and I couldn't see
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138 bastards off, and we can do it
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140 himself Jose. Listening in, I r
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142 To my relief, Amy was sleeping
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144 near Tombstone. Johnny Ringo wa
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146 "'Clubs', eh? Sounds a little..
Page 149 and 150:
148 Millions of Screaming Yahoos #1
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150 Seth and I had been the only tw
Page 153 and 154:
152 Instead of talking, I pondered
Page 155 and 156:
154 I was a little surprised, and a
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156 Seth answered it. After a short
Page 159 and 160:
158 added with a giggle, "He's a wi
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160 her new home. The only sacred t
Page 163 and 164:
162 "Excellent. Thanks, I'll go get
Page 165 and 166:
164 BIG the interior of the truck's
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166 Millions of Screaming Yahoos 19
Page 169 and 170:
168 PART Four: ROGER’S Epistles o
Page 171 and 172:
170 the left feels morally superior
Page 173 and 174:
172 Rev Roger, Epistle 2: Join the
Page 175 and 176:
174 Rev Roger Epistle#3: How do YOU
Page 177 and 178:
176 Rev Roger, Epistle #4: To the R
Page 179 and 180:
178 Elite, and they get to have the
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180 wrong...we are congenital troub
Page 183 and 184:
182 PART FIVE: Life in the Age of D
Page 185 and 186:
184 Rick takes truly foolish chance
Page 187 and 188:
186 say AVERAGE, not MEDIAN. What t
Page 189 and 190:
188 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 3
Page 191 and 192:
190 Bad craziness...any fool can se
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192 shit through?" Rick just looked
Page 195 and 196:
194 "I thought we were overnighting
Page 197 and 198:
196 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 5
Page 199 and 200:
198 Life in the Age of Dumb, art 6:
Page 201 and 202:
200 heedless of The crumbling found
Page 203 and 204:
202 Sr was talking about when he sa
Page 205 and 206:
204 Rev Roger Rant #1: Roger Gets H
Page 207 and 208:
206 Rev Roger, Rant #2: Get Off Of
Page 209 and 210:
208 Rev Roger Rant #3: Why I killed
Page 211 and 212:
210 Or maybe not...maybe they'd jus
Page 213 and 214:
212 Rev Roger, Rant#5: Eris isn't t
Page 215 and 216:
214 Rev Roger, Rant 6: The End(tm)
Page 217 and 218:
216 "But what about Little Billy?",
Page 219 and 220:
218 another. He isn't REALLY mockin
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220 totally arbitrary decisions, ju
Page 223 and 224:
222 Rev Roger Rant #10: Where the H
Page 225 and 226:
224 Who has the correct idea? Well,
Page 227 and 228:
226 PMs (he can't, but he doesn't e
Page 229 and 230:
228 Rev Roger, Rant #14: What's My
Page 231 and 232:
230 Rev Roger, Rant 16: That's All
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232 world is - and will remain - a
Page 235 and 236:
234 Goodbye, Pedro. Originally post
Page 237 and 238:
236 - serious about having a good t
Page 239 and 240:
238 Our police will protect you fro
Page 241 and 242:
240 The Gospel According to Roger B
Page 243 and 244:
242 Transcript #32 WAKE UP! Huh? WA
Page 245 and 246:
244 Rev Roger's election rant #1: T
Page 247 and 248:
246 Originally posted Jun 06, 2005
Page 249 and 250:
248 10 more things I know are true:
Page 251 and 252:
250 Lost in America, part 1. Origin
Page 253 and 254:
252 ...Back to mi casa, lock the do
Page 255 and 256:
254 my associate here doesn't look
Page 257:
256 Lost in America #3: Lost ₪ or
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OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

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