OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

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183 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 1: They All Drowned. Originally posted Jul 07, 2004 "Eleven Egyptians drowned in a well yesterday, in the small town of Nuweiba, in the Sinai Peninsula, while attempting to rescue a chicken. The chicken survived." - AP, 1994, as quoted by the Fortean Times. Some people, it seems, are too dumb to live...and my new coworker, Rick, is one of them. Rick is a forty-Fiftyish pilot that flies one of the Beech 18s that I maintain (yes, the Good Reverend has arrived, and is already gainfully employed, back in my original field of mechanical work). Now, understand that the Beech 18 is a pig. It really doesn't like to fly, and will do just about anything it can to achieve "an undesirable aircraft/ground interface". It does strange things, like stalling, for no apparent reason...how's THAT for a comforting notion...there are HUNDREDS of these clunkers still in service, and odds are one flies over your house once a week, if not more. One minute, you are minding your own business, watching "HeeHaw" on Nick at Night, and the next an antique POS falls through your roof and kills you. Are you ready for that? Are you ready to be front page news, in a story that involves the words "closed casket"? Who can explain these types of things? Not Rick, he's an idiot. Not the drooling redneck kind of idiot, but rather a man with NO sense of self-preservation. Apparently, Rick was involved in some South of the border monkey business back in the 80s, and became an adrenaline junkie. I've seen this type of thing before...mostly in the army, but other places, too. or kill me
184 Rick takes truly foolish chances with the venerable Beech, such as flying through storms to cut time off of his trip...Our company's prime cargo being newspapers...which "age" quickly. I've worked with Rick for exactly one (1) day, and I'm more than a little nervous. As a flightline mechanic, the small company I work for requires that we mechanics get some flight time in on the aircraft we maintain...sort of a QA thing, I guess. This means that eventually, I'll have to fly with Rick. He's a nice enough guy, and a good conversationalist, but I have to fly with this guy. In other words, I have to fly with this guy. Any more chickens in that well? Or kill me. or kill me
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OR KILL ME!! Heresies, Rants, Sermo
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2 CONTENTS PART ONE: Sermons 3 PART
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4 Rev Roger Sermon #1: A rant/sermo
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6 Rev Roger Sermon 2: Attack of the
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8 Rev Roger sermon #3 ...get yer ba
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10 But what of those brains? When's
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12 supervisor, I caught an intervie
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14 boy)...and it ISN'T GOING TO! No
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16 Now, the money grubbing b@stards
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18 transition will be easier. Hell,
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20 his frickin' Gestapo, the proble
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22 this: If you get out of line, we
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24 you are no longer afraid of mist
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26 Rev Roger Sermon #11: Land of th
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28 Why the hell should they? They h
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30 crazy-glueing the enter button (
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32 that the battles of the 60s had
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34 the descendants of slaves who ch
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36 You could get on the internet an
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38 Rev Roger Sermon#17 What have yo
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40 legally) booger up the local ATF
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42 Rev Roger Sermon #18: DOOM Origi
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44 that the fun might ever come bac
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46 Grayfaces do not know they are d
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48 Rev Roger Sermon #21: Leeetttts
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50 Rev Roger Sermon #22: The Machin
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52 So if you wish to have a plutocr
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54 With Zevon gone, the most I can
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56 trying...There will be NO revolu
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58 Sermon #25: THE FINAL WORD Origi
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60 4. Do I feel that I have the rig
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62 Rev Roger Special Bonus Sermon #
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64 the bottle, drop the dugout, and
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66 anymore...but your parents ARE.
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68 People are dragged out of line i
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70 most nations, I seriously doubt
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72 All these things I have seen, an
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74 Word Game" or "What are you eati
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76 The Good Rev Roger Sermon #33: T
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78 That’s right, the television
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80 passers by with your message…a
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82 Sermon #34: Classified. φ or ki
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84 He really DOES laugh at the GOP
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86 Rev Roger: The Heresies, chapter
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88 6. Free Radicals: A Free Radical
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90 We are mutants. That's right, mu
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92 Heresies 3: Classified. Ξ or ki
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94 Eris is the goddess of DISCORD.
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96 4. Latent Discordians - Discordi
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98 PART Three Millions of Screaming
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100 By HAMZA HENDAWI, Associated Pr
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102 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, p
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104 accomplishment. "See, Millie? T
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106 rednecks, Antabuse is a powerfu
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108 "What kind of pussy do you thin
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114 "I think I have the answer to t
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116 seem to be without sin, so you
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118 Image: A run-down doublewide tr
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120 Jim said, "Well, watch your bac
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126 Now, Bowzer has always been an
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128 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, P
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130 I thought for a moment, and sai
Page 133 and 134: 132 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, p
Page 135 and 136: 134 Cheryl slapped me, burst into t
Page 137 and 138: 136 pitch black, and I couldn't see
Page 139 and 140: 138 bastards off, and we can do it
Page 141 and 142: 140 himself Jose. Listening in, I r
Page 143 and 144: 142 To my relief, Amy was sleeping
Page 145 and 146: 144 near Tombstone. Johnny Ringo wa
Page 147 and 148: 146 "'Clubs', eh? Sounds a little..
Page 149 and 150: 148 Millions of Screaming Yahoos #1
Page 151 and 152: 150 Seth and I had been the only tw
Page 153 and 154: 152 Instead of talking, I pondered
Page 155 and 156: 154 I was a little surprised, and a
Page 157 and 158: 156 Seth answered it. After a short
Page 159 and 160: 158 added with a giggle, "He's a wi
Page 161 and 162: 160 her new home. The only sacred t
Page 163 and 164: 162 "Excellent. Thanks, I'll go get
Page 165 and 166: 164 BIG the interior of the truck's
Page 167 and 168: 166 Millions of Screaming Yahoos 19
Page 169 and 170: 168 PART Four: ROGER’S Epistles o
Page 171 and 172: 170 the left feels morally superior
Page 173 and 174: 172 Rev Roger, Epistle 2: Join the
Page 175 and 176: 174 Rev Roger Epistle#3: How do YOU
Page 177 and 178: 176 Rev Roger, Epistle #4: To the R
Page 179 and 180: 178 Elite, and they get to have the
Page 181 and 182: 180 wrong...we are congenital troub
Page 183: 182 PART FIVE: Life in the Age of D
Page 187 and 188: 186 say AVERAGE, not MEDIAN. What t
Page 189 and 190: 188 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 3
Page 191 and 192: 190 Bad craziness...any fool can se
Page 193 and 194: 192 shit through?" Rick just looked
Page 195 and 196: 194 "I thought we were overnighting
Page 197 and 198: 196 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 5
Page 199 and 200: 198 Life in the Age of Dumb, art 6:
Page 201 and 202: 200 heedless of The crumbling found
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Page 205 and 206: 204 Rev Roger Rant #1: Roger Gets H
Page 207 and 208: 206 Rev Roger, Rant #2: Get Off Of
Page 209 and 210: 208 Rev Roger Rant #3: Why I killed
Page 211 and 212: 210 Or maybe not...maybe they'd jus
Page 213 and 214: 212 Rev Roger, Rant#5: Eris isn't t
Page 215 and 216: 214 Rev Roger, Rant 6: The End(tm)
Page 217 and 218: 216 "But what about Little Billy?",
Page 219 and 220: 218 another. He isn't REALLY mockin
Page 221 and 222: 220 totally arbitrary decisions, ju
Page 223 and 224: 222 Rev Roger Rant #10: Where the H
Page 225 and 226: 224 Who has the correct idea? Well,
Page 227 and 228: 226 PMs (he can't, but he doesn't e
Page 229 and 230: 228 Rev Roger, Rant #14: What's My
Page 231 and 232: 230 Rev Roger, Rant 16: That's All
Page 233 and 234: 232 world is - and will remain - a
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234 Goodbye, Pedro. Originally post
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236 - serious about having a good t
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238 Our police will protect you fro
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240 The Gospel According to Roger B
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242 Transcript #32 WAKE UP! Huh? WA
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244 Rev Roger's election rant #1: T
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246 Originally posted Jun 06, 2005
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248 10 more things I know are true:
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250 Lost in America, part 1. Origin
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252 ...Back to mi casa, lock the do
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254 my associate here doesn't look
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256 Lost in America #3: Lost ₪ or
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OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

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