OR KILL ME!! - Principia Discordia

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53 Rev Roger Sermon #23: Bad Vibes in Mudville Originally posted September 08, 2003 Bad Vibes in Mudville The perversity of the universe tends to a maximum. --Finagle's first law I have tried, many times, to kick the politics habit, an addiction more foul than smoking, or even professional football. I have tried, and I have failed. I have used every method known to man, from self-hypnosis to avesion therapy...but nothing seemed to work...except music. I found that with the right tunes, I could block out politics for most of an hour!. But no more; with the passing this last Sunday of Warren Zevon, the music world has become a little bleaker. The author of "Werewolves of London", and "Layers, guns, and money" has passed on, carried off by some form of cancer that most people could not pronounce. And Reagan lives on, and on, and on... This is no suprise; Nixon outlived Elvis, after all, once again proving the malevolence of Gawd. I think we all see where HIS/HER priorities are...So, in the interests of kissing Gawd's ass, while I have the albums of Elvis & Zevon, I have installed masks of Nixon and Reagan over my computer. They look down on me, for a sinner such as I is definitely in need of their guidance...though, so far, they are mute on the subject of NFL odds. or kill me
54 With Zevon gone, the most I can do to block out the babbling of Cspan is Orff's Carmina Burana. Give it a listen; I would not steer you wrong...seriously, if you are listening to Orff and NOT burning down a village, you SHOULD be. It's a poor substitute, of course, but it's all there is; we all need something, especially those of us in Mudville (the country formerly known as the USA)...hell, the news is so bad these days that even the frickin' M<strong>OR</strong>MONS are surly. A few came by the house the other day, and threatened to beat me up if I didn't accept their tracts. I finally got rid of them by macing one, and sicking the dawg on the other...my dawg being a 90 pound brute of a mutt who views people at the door as a contact sport. They tried to escape, babbling something about the police..."Police?", I laughed, "you don't want THEM involved. They'd beat the shyt out of you bigamists and lock you in a cage! Ascroft is in now, you perverts, and he's going to put the arm on you people!". I began kicking them, and they ran away, cursing, pursued by the Dawg. Afterward, I was wracked with guilt...I actually used Ashcroft's name as a threat! What was I thinking? Oh, well, no help for it now...I'll just have to adjust to the New America, like everyone else. With the new VICT<strong>OR</strong>Y Act, it's not like any of us have a choice, after all. Get with the program, or be locked in a cage, like the filthy murdering terrorist-sympathizing scum you are. There is no joy in Mudville; Mighty Zevon has struck out. Or kill me. Note to readers: The Good Reverend Roger wrote this under the influence of something, but we're not sure what. I am posting it for him on his favorite BBSs, before he comes to his senses. That'll teach the bastard--Yours truly, Mrs Rev Rog, the long-suffering. or kill me
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OR KILL ME!! Heresies, Rants, Sermo
Page 3 and 4: 2 CONTENTS PART ONE: Sermons 3 PART
Page 5 and 6: 4 Rev Roger Sermon #1: A rant/sermo
Page 7 and 8: 6 Rev Roger Sermon 2: Attack of the
Page 9 and 10: 8 Rev Roger sermon #3 ...get yer ba
Page 11 and 12: 10 But what of those brains? When's
Page 13 and 14: 12 supervisor, I caught an intervie
Page 15 and 16: 14 boy)...and it ISN'T GOING TO! No
Page 17 and 18: 16 Now, the money grubbing b@stards
Page 19 and 20: 18 transition will be easier. Hell,
Page 21 and 22: 20 his frickin' Gestapo, the proble
Page 23 and 24: 22 this: If you get out of line, we
Page 25 and 26: 24 you are no longer afraid of mist
Page 27 and 28: 26 Rev Roger Sermon #11: Land of th
Page 29 and 30: 28 Why the hell should they? They h
Page 31 and 32: 30 crazy-glueing the enter button (
Page 33 and 34: 32 that the battles of the 60s had
Page 35 and 36: 34 the descendants of slaves who ch
Page 37 and 38: 36 You could get on the internet an
Page 39 and 40: 38 Rev Roger Sermon#17 What have yo
Page 41 and 42: 40 legally) booger up the local ATF
Page 43 and 44: 42 Rev Roger Sermon #18: DOOM Origi
Page 45 and 46: 44 that the fun might ever come bac
Page 47 and 48: 46 Grayfaces do not know they are d
Page 49 and 50: 48 Rev Roger Sermon #21: Leeetttts
Page 51 and 52: 50 Rev Roger Sermon #22: The Machin
Page 53: 52 So if you wish to have a plutocr
Page 57 and 58: 56 trying...There will be NO revolu
Page 59 and 60: 58 Sermon #25: THE FINAL WORD Origi
Page 61 and 62: 60 4. Do I feel that I have the rig
Page 63 and 64: 62 Rev Roger Special Bonus Sermon #
Page 65 and 66: 64 the bottle, drop the dugout, and
Page 67 and 68: 66 anymore...but your parents ARE.
Page 69 and 70: 68 People are dragged out of line i
Page 71 and 72: 70 most nations, I seriously doubt
Page 73 and 74: 72 All these things I have seen, an
Page 75 and 76: 74 Word Game" or "What are you eati
Page 77 and 78: 76 The Good Rev Roger Sermon #33: T
Page 79 and 80: 78 That’s right, the television
Page 81 and 82: 80 passers by with your message…a
Page 83 and 84: 82 Sermon #34: Classified. φ or ki
Page 85 and 86: 84 He really DOES laugh at the GOP
Page 87 and 88: 86 Rev Roger: The Heresies, chapter
Page 89 and 90: 88 6. Free Radicals: A Free Radical
Page 91 and 92: 90 We are mutants. That's right, mu
Page 93 and 94: 92 Heresies 3: Classified. Ξ or ki
Page 95 and 96: 94 Eris is the goddess of DISCORD.
Page 97 and 98: 96 4. Latent Discordians - Discordi
Page 99 and 100: 98 PART Three Millions of Screaming
Page 101 and 102: 100 By HAMZA HENDAWI, Associated Pr
Page 103 and 104: 102 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, p
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104 accomplishment. "See, Millie? T
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106 rednecks, Antabuse is a powerfu
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108 "What kind of pussy do you thin
Page 111 and 112:
110 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, p
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114 "I think I have the answer to t
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116 seem to be without sin, so you
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118 Image: A run-down doublewide tr
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120 Jim said, "Well, watch your bac
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126 Now, Bowzer has always been an
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128 Millions of Screaming Yahoos, P
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130 I thought for a moment, and sai
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134 Cheryl slapped me, burst into t
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136 pitch black, and I couldn't see
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138 bastards off, and we can do it
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140 himself Jose. Listening in, I r
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142 To my relief, Amy was sleeping
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144 near Tombstone. Johnny Ringo wa
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146 "'Clubs', eh? Sounds a little..
Page 149 and 150:
148 Millions of Screaming Yahoos #1
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150 Seth and I had been the only tw
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152 Instead of talking, I pondered
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154 I was a little surprised, and a
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156 Seth answered it. After a short
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158 added with a giggle, "He's a wi
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160 her new home. The only sacred t
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162 "Excellent. Thanks, I'll go get
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164 BIG the interior of the truck's
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166 Millions of Screaming Yahoos 19
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168 PART Four: ROGER’S Epistles o
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170 the left feels morally superior
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172 Rev Roger, Epistle 2: Join the
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174 Rev Roger Epistle#3: How do YOU
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176 Rev Roger, Epistle #4: To the R
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178 Elite, and they get to have the
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180 wrong...we are congenital troub
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182 PART FIVE: Life in the Age of D
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184 Rick takes truly foolish chance
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186 say AVERAGE, not MEDIAN. What t
Page 189 and 190:
188 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 3
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190 Bad craziness...any fool can se
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192 shit through?" Rick just looked
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194 "I thought we were overnighting
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196 Life in the Age of Dumb, part 5
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198 Life in the Age of Dumb, art 6:
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200 heedless of The crumbling found
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202 Sr was talking about when he sa
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204 Rev Roger Rant #1: Roger Gets H
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206 Rev Roger, Rant #2: Get Off Of
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208 Rev Roger Rant #3: Why I killed
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210 Or maybe not...maybe they'd jus
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212 Rev Roger, Rant#5: Eris isn't t
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214 Rev Roger, Rant 6: The End(tm)
Page 217 and 218:
216 "But what about Little Billy?",
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218 another. He isn't REALLY mockin
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220 totally arbitrary decisions, ju
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222 Rev Roger Rant #10: Where the H
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224 Who has the correct idea? Well,
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226 PMs (he can't, but he doesn't e
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228 Rev Roger, Rant #14: What's My
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230 Rev Roger, Rant 16: That's All
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232 world is - and will remain - a
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234 Goodbye, Pedro. Originally post
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236 - serious about having a good t
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238 Our police will protect you fro
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240 The Gospel According to Roger B
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242 Transcript #32 WAKE UP! Huh? WA
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244 Rev Roger's election rant #1: T
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246 Originally posted Jun 06, 2005
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248 10 more things I know are true:
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250 Lost in America, part 1. Origin
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252 ...Back to mi casa, lock the do
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254 my associate here doesn't look
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256 Lost in America #3: Lost ₪ or
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