Min tibetanska barndom i Zorgay - Life and Culture on the Tibetan ...

She often said, "Always obey your father, my good son. You
are the only one I worry about." Her eyes then became moist
<strong>and</strong> she blew her nose. "Study hard to make a better life for
yourself. Don't follow your parents' footsteps. Make a path that
will lead to a brighter world."
I said nothing, sitting there, leaning against her knees,
not underst<strong>and</strong>ing very well exactly she was trying to tell me.
One day Mother seemed lost in deep thought, sighed,
<strong>and</strong> said, "Your Father <strong>and</strong> I were once rich. My parents wanted
me to take property from your Father to make them rich, but I
refused. Afterwards, they didn't allow me to enter their home
nor would they speak to me. Your poor mother then had no
family to rely on. I was like an orphan, though both of my
parents were alive. So my dear, I don't want to leave you behind
with only your Father. Wealth is like dew on the grass that
disappears in a flash - our riches were taken away during New
China's period of social turbulence. My parents were glad I lost
my wealth. I have nothing valuable to leave you. I failed <strong>and</strong>
I'm sorry. However, you are all lucky to have such a wonderful
father. Please don't contradict him <strong>and</strong> be as kind to him as he is
to you. Don't make him angry, troubled, or worried. Because of
me, your father is weak now <strong>and</strong> can't bear any burdens. Study
hard <strong>and</strong> change your life."
"Ama, why do you only talk about Adza? We will
always be together. I'll surely buy nice clothes, good shoes, <strong>and</strong>
delicious food for Adza <strong>and</strong> you after I graduate from college
<strong>and</strong> get a job. I'll save a lot of money <strong>and</strong> take Adza <strong>and</strong> you to
Lhasa," I prattled. "Oh, Ama, one more thing, I won't buy
anything for your parents. I hate them so much," I added. Truly,
from the bottom of my heart, I despised them.
Mother smiled weakly <strong>and</strong> said in an odd-sounding
voice, "Yes, we will be together. I'll never leave you."
Mother was in pain <strong>and</strong> we could do nothing about it,
except feel sorry for her. I thought, "Mother, if only I can share
your pain a little, then I'm willing to give anything I have, even
ten years of my life. Please, Three Jewels, bless Mother <strong>and</strong>
cure her illness as soon as possible. Do not let her endure pain
<strong>and</strong> suffering any longer."
At home, my monk brother, was doing every religious
activity that the lamas asked Father to perform to lessen
▪54▪