Managing Sticky Situations at Work

Sticky Situations with Subordinates 87She gets up. ‘‘I promise I will get the designs to you first thingtomorrow morning. Then, can I draw the bushes in those designs?’’‘‘If you get those designs to us by no later than noon tomorrow, Iwill show you exactly how to insert the bushes and trees.’’ (Finds resolutionwith positive consequences.)ANALYSISWill Emily remain committed to her job? Will she change her behavior?We do not know. But, Ivan did show compassion, and he diddemonstrate curiosity. He also made the consequences clear. By notplacing blame directly onto her, he managed to keep her from gettingtoo defensive. When she finally stated her concerns about not learninganything about architecture, they worked out a solution. Ivan, however,reiterated what she must do in order to earn the chance to drawbushes and trees. His clarity on what he expected of her and whatshe must do to get more responsibility enabled him to say it just right.Specify the Problem. Ivan repeated several times in the conversationthat Emily must get the designs to the team by noon. He didnot care how she did it or what caused such blatant lateness. He knewshe often took shopping trips and visited with friends, but he did notmention these things. So long as the designs arrived in the office bynoon, she would have done what he required. In a disciplinary conversationit is important not to get sidetracked and not to talk about toomany infringements. Select the one thing you want corrected. If theother negative behaviors continue (and often they don’t), you can dealwith those in a later conversation.Invite the Other Person to Talk. Emily responded defensively. Shereadily talked but in defense of her behavior. Even though Ivan didnot say, ‘‘You are at fault,’’ she knew she had abused her position onthejob.IvaninvitedEmilytotellherstoryintwoplaces.Thefirstoccurred when he asked what happened yesterday and the secondoccurred after he stated the implied consequence that she might needto be transferred out of his department.Join Feeling with Fact. Ivan, being a Technical, prefers not toshare feelings. His EQ score is probably not terribly high. He knew,however, that he was dealing with an Expressive who responds wellto feelings. In the first statement of the problem, Ivan said he was disappointed.He later stated his frustrations with her performance. Healso mentioned Mr. Whippet’s confidence in Emily and inferred that