Managing Sticky Situations at Work

More documents

Recommendations

Info

Sticky Interview Situations 153‘‘So, you’re worried that any mom you interview will have the sameproblem, and you don’t want to go through that again, right?’’(Shows compassion.)‘‘I suppose I overdid it, didn’t I? I wanted to get a sense of yourcommitment to work and personally I’m amazed by what you’veaccomplished with two kids. I can barely breathe with just one.’’Wanda sits back. ‘‘I appreciate that recognition. Not everyone realizesthe constant struggle. That in and of itself shows my commitmentto work and my ability to persevere. I’m happy to talk about that. Youare also welcome to talk to any of my professors who will vouch for mydedication to the team. It had troubled me, though, when I tried totalk about my work, we kept going back to my personal life. I understandyour concerns now and your curiosity. Thank you for sharingthat. How can we move forward from here?’’ (Invites her to helpresolve the problem.)‘‘You’ve made it clear that you have a strong work ethic. That’simportant to us. Like I said this is a conservative company and eventhough family values are held high, so is a strong work ethic. Howabout we go forward with your telling me how you see your researchskills specifically benefiting our division?’’ANALYSISWanda struggled to get Janice to allow her to talk about her workexperience. When she asked the question about what attracted Janiceto her résumé she attempted to shift the spotlight away from personalissues. It worked for a while, but then Janice returned to asking personalquestions. Wanda showed patience as well as compassion andcuriosity. She finally, however, had to specify the problem as gentlyas she could.Specify the Problem. Wanda knew that the personal questions Janicewas asking were clearly illegal. Interviewers are not supposed to askcandidates, particularly women candidates, about their children ortheir child care plans. If Wanda had pointed out that the questionswere illegal, she would have alienated Janice and lost the opportunityfor continued interviews. She could have threatened a lawsuit unlessJanice sent her to the next stage of interviews, but that would havebeen very risky. She elected to say it just right by specifying the problemgently, namely, that Janice kept asking questions that were unrelatedto her work.
154 Managing Sticky Situations at WorkInvite the Other Person to Talk. Wanda invited Janice to talk intwo places. First, when she specified the problem. She did this to giveJanice a chance to explain what was going on. The second place waswhen she was looking for a resolution. She gave Janice a chance toreframe the interview and move forward.Join Feeling with Fact. In two instances Wanda said she was ‘‘a bitconfused.’’ By using a nonexplosive feeling, like confusion, Wandaenabled Janice to help her understand what was happening in theinterview. Wanda did this from an orientation of curiosity. She alsoshowed compassion for Janice after the interviewer explained whathappened with another employee as well as her own stress with findingbalance in her life.Resolve the Issue. By putting her feelings on the table and clearlyspecifying the problem within her limits, Wanda gave Janice a chanceto resolve the problem. Wanda wanted to give Janice the power backand thereby put the interview back on track without creating badfeelings.CONCLUSIONIn this chapter we looked at two sticky interview situations. In thefirst we saw a situation most interviewers dread, namely, instanceswhere the candidate clams up. It is very hard to conduct a strategicinterview when the candidate does not talk. Paul gave Richard everyopportunity to talk. He wanted Richard to leave the interview understandingwhy this job was not the best fit. Some interviewers do notcare about the candidate’s feelings. Once they decide to reject the candidate,they either end the interview quickly or ask abrupt, closedquestions. Paul, who is probably a Sympathetic, preferred not to crushthe candidate’s spirit. He persisted and thereby turned a sticky,uncomfortable interview into a professional conversation that ledRichard to the realization that the job was not for him—somethingPaul already knew.The second case illustrated a sticky situation that many people whointerview for jobs face. Wanda desired to get past the first round ofinterviews so she could showcase her scientific skills among fellow scientists.Even though Janice began the interview well by saying shewanted to get to know Wanda better, she crossed the line by probingpersonal areas that are legally sensitive. Wanda had to decide howmuch she was willing to endure. Once Janice went past that line,
Page 2:
Managing StickySituations at WorkCo
Page 6 and 7:
Managing StickySituations at WorkCo
Page 8:
ContentsIllustrationsviiAcknowledgm
Page 12:
AcknowledgmentsAs a disclaimer, all
Page 15 and 16:
xiiIntroductionis the word that oft
Page 17 and 18:
xivIntroduction4. You supervise a g
Page 20 and 21:
Chapter 1The Say It Just Right (SIJ
Page 22 and 23:
The Say It Just Right (SIJR) Model
Page 24 and 25:
Page 26 and 27:
Page 28 and 29:
Page 30 and 31:
Page 32 and 33:
Page 34 and 35:
Page 36 and 37:
Chapter 2Personality OverlayAtthiss
Page 38 and 39:
Personality Overlay 19BOLD PERSONAL
Page 40 and 41:
Personality Overlay 21energy seems
Page 42 and 43:
Larry is clearly a Technical person
Page 44 and 45:
Personality Overlay 25‘‘John kn
Page 46:
Personality Overlay 27Resolve the I
Page 49 and 50:
30 Managing Sticky Situations at Wo
Page 51 and 52:
Page 53 and 54:
Page 55 and 56:
Page 57 and 58:
Page 59 and 60:
Page 61 and 62:
Page 63 and 64:
Page 65 and 66:
Page 67 and 68:
Page 69 and 70:
Page 71 and 72:
Page 73 and 74:
Page 75 and 76:
Page 77 and 78:
Page 79 and 80:
Page 82 and 83:
Chapter 5Sticky Situations with Cli
Page 84 and 85:
Sticky Situations with Clients 65Un
Page 86 and 87:
Sticky Situations with Clients 67
Page 88 and 89:
Sticky Situations with Clients 69ve
Page 90 and 91:
Sticky Situations with Clients 71
Page 92 and 93:
‘‘I’m glad to hear that. I wa
Page 94 and 95:
Sticky Situations with Clients 75fr
Page 96 and 97:
Sticky Situations with Clients 77AN
Page 98 and 99:
Chapter 6Sticky Situations with Sub
Page 100 and 101:
Sticky Situations with Subordinates
Page 102 and 103:
Page 104 and 105:
Page 106 and 107:
Page 108 and 109:
Page 110 and 111:
Page 112 and 113:
Page 114 and 115:
Page 116 and 117:
Chapter 7Sticky Situations in Meeti
Page 118 and 119:
Sticky Situations in Meetings 99you
Page 120 and 121:
Sticky Situations in Meetings 101
Page 122 and 123: Sticky Situations in Meetings 103to
Page 124 and 125: Sticky Situations in Meetings 105me
Page 126 and 127: Sticky Situations in Meetings 107SA
Page 128 and 129: Sticky Situations in Meetings 109wa
Page 130 and 131: Sticky Situations in Meetings 111SA
Page 132 and 133: Sticky Situations in Meetings 113ac
Page 134 and 135: Sticky Situations in Meetings 115Al
Page 136 and 137: Sticky Situations in Meetings 117wh
Page 138 and 139: Chapter 8Sticky Romantic Situations
Page 140 and 141: Sticky Romantic Situations in the O
Page 158: Sticky Romantic Situations in the O
Page 161 and 162: 142 Managing Sticky Situations at W
Page 171: 152 Managing Sticky Situations at W
Page 176 and 177: Chapter 10Sticky Etiquette Situatio
Page 178 and 179: Sticky Etiquette Situations 159not
Page 180 and 181: Sticky Etiquette Situations 161‘
Page 182 and 183: Sticky Etiquette Situations 163she
Page 184 and 185: Sticky Etiquette Situations 165Rita
Page 186 and 187: Sticky Etiquette Situations 167mone
Page 188 and 189: Her intent with this question was n
Page 190 and 191: Sticky Etiquette Situations 171inte
Page 192: Sticky Etiquette Situations 173it i
Page 221 and 222: 202 Appendix 14. True5. False6. Fal
Page 223 and 224:
204 Appendix 1Strategic interviewer
Page 225 and 226:
206 Appendix 2360 By Design®—Des
Page 228 and 229:
IndexAdjourning Stage in groups, 10
Page 230 and 231:
Index 211hot seat, 35-39How Good a
Page 232:
Index 213Teenage Daughter Is Busted
show all

Managing Sticky Situations at Work

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?