Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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Sticky Etiquette Situations 165Rita explores the power sources. Art has been with the companyfor a long time. People like him, and he’s good at his job. He holdsno power over Rita, but if she wishes to move up in the company, havingArt as a friend and advocate might assist her. She decides to handlethe situation without confronting Art in an SIJR Conversation.NEXT STEPSRita creates a plan for dealing with Art. She finds out from the officemanager when Art will be in the office and when he’s scheduled totravel. She posts his in-days on her calendar. When Art comes intoher office, she shuts down her computer and spends the allotted time(30 minutes) fully engaged with him. He tells her many interestingstories about experiences on the road and with the company. Afterabout 30 minutes, if Art does not rise to leave, Rita tells him she’sgot to get back to work. Usually this is enough for Art to go, now thatshe’s spent ‘‘quality’’ time with him. When she has a deadline to meeton Art’s in-days, she sends him an e-mail to let him know that she’sworking on a special project. She invites him to have a cup of coffeeat a later time.Once Rita gained more control on the visits and wasn’t surprised byhis intrusions, she began to look forward to Art’s stories. They havesince become close friends.STICKY SITUATION #22:WHOSE TURN IS IT TOPICK UP THE CHECK?Adelaide and Ricky work as pharmacists in a large drug store.They have gone to lunch together three times. The first time,Adelaide agreed to pay because Ricky forgot to bring his creditcard. He told her he’d make it up to her the next time. Duringtheir next lunch together, Ricky had to leave early to meet his wifefor a parent-teacher meeting at school. He rushed out before thecheck was delivered and once again, Adelaide paid for both theirlunches. During their third time out, another friend joinedthem. This time, Adelaide had to leave early. When she rose toleave, Ricky said, ‘‘Why don’t you just leave me 10 bucks, andI’ll bring you the change.’’ Adelaide was surprised since she’dpaid for lunch on the two previous occasions, but she didn’t wantto make a big deal of it in front of the other person. She handed
166 Managing Sticky Situations at WorkRicky a 10-dollar bill. Ricky never gave her the change. She suspectsthat 10 dollars paid not only for her sandwich but forRicky’s as well.APPLYING THE SAY IT JUST RIGHT MODELDECISION POINTSAdelaide weighs the costs. Ricky and Adelaide earn the sameincome. She sees no reason for Ricky not to either pay for his ownmeal or to occasionally pay for Adelaide’s. Because they work togetherevery day, Adelaide doesn’t want to cause a rift, but she feels as if Rickyis taking advantage of her. He has never thanked her for the lunchesshe’s paid for, and he’s never offered to pay her back. She’s noticedthat Ricky tends to cut corners in other ways at work as well. She wondersabout his integrity and decides that even if he gets angry with herand refuses to have lunch with her again, she’ll feel better about herselfif she confronts him.Adelaide sets the limits. Clearly Ricky is trying to get as much outof Adelaide as he can. She doubts that he’s forgotten that she’s paidfor his lunch now three times. She decides that she will no longer goto lunch with him unless he pays for his own meal. Even when theirlunch break coincides, she prefers to eat alone.Adelaide examines the power sources. Both Adelaide and Rickycame to the pharmacy at about the same time. Both have similar experienceand credentials. Adelaide has a great relationship with theirboss. She’s been told that she has the ability to become the head pharmacistif she continues working there. She suspects that Ricky, whooften leaves early and comes to work late, has not had such glowingreviews. Even though Adelaide does not want to hurt the good workingrelationship she has with Ricky, she sees that she holds a strongerpower base than he does.PERSONALITY OVERLAYAdelaide is probably a Sympathetic. If she’d been a Bold, she wouldhave demanded that Ricky pay for the second lunch. A Technicalwould have kept a clear record of what was owed her and presentedit without conscience to Ricky. An Expressive would not have saidanything to Ricky about the money owed but would also have lookedfor any alternative rather than to eat alone. Being a Sympathetic,Adelaide showed compassion for Ricky when he had to duck out earlyand when he forgot his credit card. It wasn’t until he asked her for
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ContentsIllustrationsviiAcknowledgm
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AcknowledgmentsAs a disclaimer, all
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xiiIntroductionis the word that oft
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xivIntroduction4. You supervise a g
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Chapter 1The Say It Just Right (SIJ
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The Say It Just Right (SIJR) Model
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Chapter 2Personality OverlayAtthiss
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Personality Overlay 19BOLD PERSONAL
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Personality Overlay 21energy seems
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Larry is clearly a Technical person
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Personality Overlay 25‘‘John kn
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Personality Overlay 27Resolve the I
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Chapter 5Sticky Situations with Cli
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Chapter 6Sticky Situations with Sub
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Sticky Situations with Subordinates
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Chapter 7Sticky Situations in Meeti
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Page 221 and 222: 202 Appendix 14. True5. False6. Fal
Page 223 and 224: 204 Appendix 1Strategic interviewer
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Page 228 and 229: IndexAdjourning Stage in groups, 10
Page 230 and 231: Index 211hot seat, 35-39How Good a
Page 232: Index 213Teenage Daughter Is Busted
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