Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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Chapter 2Personality OverlayAtthisstageweunderstandtheSIJRModel,andwehaveobservedhow it works. We are now ready to apply it to sticky situations. Holdon! If we faced cardboard people every day, who always acted the sameway, we could apply the SIJR Model right now. Unfortunately (somemay say fortunately) people are different. These differences requirethat we not only understand what to say and how to say it, but alsoto whom we are saying it.Crowley and Elster in Working with YouIs Killing Me handle thisproblem nicely. They describe seven different personalities and suggestideas about what to do when faced with these different people. 1According to the first of the Three C’s we cannot change the otherperson. We must, therefore, adjust our style whenever we face a differentpersonality. Crowley and Elster come from this orientation. Theysuggest ideas about how to ‘‘unhook’’ from the bad place these personalitiesput us in and regain control. 2PERSONALITY OVERLAY DEFINEDThe Three C’s comprise the foundation to the SIJR Model, and theDecision Points provide the framework. The Personality Overlay
18 Managing Sticky Situations at WorkPersonality Overlaycolors in the background behind the picture. Imagine a photo of theforum in ancient Rome as we see it today with the rocks, columns,pieces of statuary, and gravel foot paths. Visualize an overlay thatdepicts the way ancient Rome looked centuries ago with intact buildings,temples, magnificent statues, and elaborate houses. That overlayshows us the full picture. Without that overlay we cannot envision theway things were. Similarly, when dealing with sticky situations, weencounter people who overlay reactions to the events around them.We must consider these people and their unique personality stylesbefore we embark on a SIJR Conversation.Unlike Crowley and Elster’s model, the SIJR Model remains intacteven when we adjust our style to accommodate different personalities.We begin with the Decision Points in order to decide whether to havea conversation and if so, how to prepare ourselves for the limitationsand risks. Given each personality we must adjust our SIJR Conversationaccordingly. To simplify our analysis of personality, we selectedthe styles created by James Brewer et al. in Power Management: AThree-Step Program for Successful Leadership. 3Brewer created a simple but effective survey to determine personalitystyle. Unlike some of the more popular assessments, such asMyers-Briggs—whose styles baffle us and often disappear from ourmemories (ENFJ [extrovert intuitive, feeling, judging], ISTP [introvert,sensing, thinking, perceiving]), Brewer’s style types are easy toidentify: Bold, Expressive, Sympathetic, and Technical (BEST). 4 Furthermore,if you cannot administer the My BEST Profile, 5 you canquickly observe behaviors and deduce one of the styles.
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Chapter 6Sticky Situations with Sub
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Sticky Situations with Subordinates
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Chapter 7Sticky Situations in Meeti
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Chapter 8Sticky Romantic Situations
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Sticky Romantic Situations in the O
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Chapter 10Sticky Etiquette Situatio
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204 Appendix 1Strategic interviewer
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206 Appendix 2360 By Design®—Des
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IndexAdjourning Stage in groups, 10
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Index 211hot seat, 35-39How Good a
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Index 213Teenage Daughter Is Busted
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Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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