Managing Sticky Situations at Work

Sticky Situations with Co-Workers 49‘‘Listen, Dale, I’m disappointed that you act as if I never helpedyou. I recommended you for this promotion because I thought youcould do the job. I know I agreed to help you out last week, but I’vebeen doing that now for almost six weeks. I’m frustrated that you arestill calling me.’’ (Specifies the problem and joins feelings withfact.)‘‘Don’t worry. I won’t bother you anymore.’’Samantha sighs. ‘‘I should have been more direct early on. That wasmy fault. I really want you to be successful in your position. I knowyou’ve got the talent. I thought I was helping you, but apparently, Iwasn’t. I was probably making you too dependent on me. Tell mewhat I can do now to turn this around.’’ (Takes responsibility forher part in the problem and invites Dale to talk.)Dale rubs his hand over his head. Finally he says, ‘‘You’re right, I’vecounted on you for too much. I guess you’ve just always been there.’’‘‘So what can we do now?’’ repeats Samantha‘‘Well, I feel really good about doing the budget stuff since youguided me through the last cycle. And, I’ve always been fine with handlingthe staff. It’s those presentations that pop up that freak me out.I’m not comfortable saying what we need or where we’re going.’’‘‘Tell me how the presentation went. Give me a blow by blow.’’Dale leans forward. He tells her he pulled together everything shesuggested and developed a PowerPoint slide for each request item.He emphasized what they had accomplished over the last year andwherehewantedtotakethedepartmentoverthenextsixmonths.‘‘When Dr. Jones asked me how much staff I needed, I froze. I thinkhe was looking for places to cut, and my mind went blank. All I couldthink of was, ‘Don’t fire anyone on my team.’ I had no idea what Imight say, but I sure didn’t want to lose anyone. So, I blurted out anumber. God knows if it was accurate.’’Samantha listens. ‘‘You know how many people it takes to do thejob around here. I’m sure the number you gave him was right ontarget.’’Dale shrugs. ‘‘We’ll see. I’ve heard nothing.’’‘‘It’s too soon. You won’t hear anything for at least another week.’’Samantha pauses. ‘‘Dale, what can I do to help you feel confidentwith your presentations? It sounds as if you’re doing fine with everythingelse.’’ (Begins resolving the issue.)‘‘Don’t leave me hanging out to dry like you did last week.’’