Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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Sticky E-situations 187God’s love through his Son, Jesus. I love the people here as if theywere part of my own family, and—’’‘‘It would seem to me, then, Nichole, that you would not want tooffend anyone in the company, right?’’Her eyes widen. ‘‘Of course not. How could sharing the love ofJesus offend people?’’Mickey sighs. ‘‘That’s the problem. We are a very large companywith layers of people from different cultures and walks of life. Noteveryone considers themselves Christian—’’‘‘Then, I need to help them see the Light.’’‘‘No, Nichole, that is not your role. When you say that you need tohelp people see the light, it feels as if their way is wrong. Doing that isprejudicial because it shows a bias against other people’s religions. I’mcurious to know what you thought you were doing when you quotedverses of the Bible that suggested certain lifestyles were inappropriate.’’(Invites Nichole to talk.)‘‘The Bible is clear about homosexuality.’’Mickey sits back. ‘‘In your view the Bible’s clear. In other views, it’snot so clear. The New Testament calls us to love one another regardless.Some might say that means love everyone, even gay people. But,I’m not here to argue points of the Bible. I simply want to bring toyour attention how some of your blogging might offend people.’’(Respecifies the problem.)‘‘I know what the Bible says. I wanted to share the message with allthe wonderful people here who helped me get through Jamey’s illness.That’s all.’’‘‘If I understand, then, your goal was to share your religious viewsbecause people helped you get through Jamey’s illness. I’m sure thatmeantalottoyou.Howcanyouremainopenwithoutoffendingothers?’’ (Invites Nichole to talk about resolution.)She shrugs. ‘‘Are you going to censor my blogs?’’Mickey says, ‘‘I’m frustrated because I don’t want to censor anyone.The intent of the company blog was to create a sense of open communication.We’ve been quite successful with that. People in other partsof the country feel closer to headquarters and vice versa. It’s been agreat success. The external blog has helped us keep a good pulse onour customers. If we allow people to vent on controversial or prejudicialtopics, which might offend others, we might turn people off;they’ll quit reading the blog and quit posting. I want openness, but I
188 Managing Sticky Situations at Workalso want discretion. I’m frustrated about how to do that. Can youhelp me here?’’ (Joins feelings with facts.)‘‘I suppose I took some liberties. I just felt so close to everyone, andI wanted to share my joy. Mickey, you just can’t imagine the Lightunless you’ve seen it. I want to share it with you. You can see it, too,if you—’’‘‘How can you share that special joy without stepping on people’sreligious beliefs?’’ (Asks for resolution.)Nichole thinks. ‘‘The Lord asked me to share the Good Word aspart of his healing of Jamey. I see that as an important part of my mission—God’smission. It’s what Jesus asked his disciples to do. I haveto do what God asks me to do. If I post on the blog, I have to sharethe Lord’s message. It’s the way of God.’’‘‘I’m really sorry, Nichole, but you leave me with just one choice as Isee it,’’ Mickey says. ‘‘I have to ask you not to post on the blog andnot to comment on other people’s posts, unless you can keep yourcomments strictly professional. By professional, I mean, you can shareyour successes on the job or your work-related concerns, as others inthe company do. If your comments cross the line and become prejudicial,I will have to remove your password access. I’m curious to know ifyou can think of any other alternatives.’’ (Resolving the issue.)Nichole frowns. ‘‘I’d like to have a chance to pray about this. Can Igive you an answer tomorrow?’’Mickey rises. ‘‘That’s fine. Meantime, I’m asking you not to putanything on the blog that has a religious tone. Will you agree to that?’’Nichole nods and rises. ‘‘Yes.’’ANALYSISMickey did not expect to change Nichole’s beliefs. He was not evensure he could change her behavior as far as the blog was concerned.He wanted to raise her awareness about how her words might affectother people. Doing so did not seem to affect Nichole. She was determinedthat it was her duty to share her beliefs.Being an Expressive, Nichole revealed her feelings but did not listento Mickey. He had to interrupt her several times to make his point,and he had to respecify the problem. Mickey could have caught Nichole’sattention had he stated his feelings more strongly. For example,he could have said the posts offended him and explained why.Although Mickey asked Nichole to help him reach a suitable resolution,he stated clear limits. He wanted openness on the blog but
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ContentsIllustrationsviiAcknowledgm
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AcknowledgmentsAs a disclaimer, all
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xiiIntroductionis the word that oft
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xivIntroduction4. You supervise a g
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Chapter 1The Say It Just Right (SIJ
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The Say It Just Right (SIJR) Model
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Chapter 2Personality OverlayAtthiss
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Personality Overlay 19BOLD PERSONAL
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Personality Overlay 21energy seems
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Larry is clearly a Technical person
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Personality Overlay 25‘‘John kn
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Personality Overlay 27Resolve the I
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Chapter 6Sticky Situations with Sub
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Sticky Situations with Subordinates
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Chapter 7Sticky Situations in Meeti
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Chapter 8Sticky Romantic Situations
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Sticky Romantic Situations in the O
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Page 223 and 224: 204 Appendix 1Strategic interviewer
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Page 230 and 231: Index 211hot seat, 35-39How Good a
Page 232: Index 213Teenage Daughter Is Busted
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Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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