Managing Sticky Situations at Work

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Personality Overlay 25‘‘John knows Sam better than I do. He gave me some good adviceabout how to deal with him. I like to find out what makes people tickbefore I talk to them. John’s suggestions helped me be more understandingand persuasive. I really think without his help, I would nothave been as successful with Sam.’’‘‘So what you are saying is that John’s input guided you in your conversationwith the employee. What about after you met with Sam? Iunderstand you shared sensitive information with John afterwards?’’(Respecifies the problem.)‘‘He just asked how it went.’’ She looks away. ‘‘Sometimes I saymorethanIshould.Itendtogetcarriedaway,andIwassoexcitedto have that case resolved. John was a huge help. I guess I might havetold him more about what happened than I should have. Honestly,though, I don’t think I violated the employee’s confidentiality.’’‘‘Just talking with John about a pending case constitutes a violation.I’m disappointed that you did this. Perhaps I had not made our policyclear enough to you. I should have talked to you about this long ago.Since John is not in HR, he has told others about this case and now itis general knowledge. How can we prevent this kind of thing fromhappening in the future?’’ (Clarifies the problem and solicits ideasfor resolution.)Nancy looks down: ‘‘I guess I need to stay in my office and not talkto so many people.’’Lewis smiles. ‘‘Really, Nancy, I don’t see that happening. You are avery engaging person, and you like interacting with others. I doubttrying to shut yourself away in your office will work. What other ideasmight work?’’ (Looks for resolution.)She turns away. ‘‘Well ...I suppose I can be more careful when talkingwith people outside our department. I don’t think I violated confidentiality,but it could appear that way. Next time, once a case is inour hands, I will tell John I can’t talk about it.’’‘‘I know how much you like to visit with people, and you have a veryfriendly style. We like that in HR. But, you have to be careful not to goover the line. It could jeopardize your career. I want you to be successfulin your work, and I also want you to enjoy what you do.’’‘‘I do enjoy my work.’’‘‘I’m glad. In the future, watch yourself when you talk to peopleoutside this department. If this kind of information leaks again, I willhave to put a warning in your personnel file. I hope I won’t have todo that.’’ (Specifies positive and negative consequences.)
26 Managing Sticky Situations at WorkANALYSISWhat personality style was Lewis dealing with? Nancy likes to talk.She enjoys being with people. She exudes a friendly manner. In alllikelihood she’s an Expressive. As an Expressive, Lewis recognized thatshe could not stop visiting with people. Furthermore, her job requiresher to know and interact with a lot of people in the company. But, shecannot share confidential information with her friends. Lewisremained firm, but he showed compassion and curiosity. In the end,he doesn’t know if Nancy will change her behavior, but he made itclear what will happen if she does not.Specify the Problem. She violated confidentiality about a currentcase.Invite the Other Person to Talk. Nancy wanted to talk right away,and that typifies her Expressive style. Lewis listened to her rationaleand tried to understand her position.Join Feelings with Fact. Lewis told her he was disappointed withher behavior and concerned about what happened.Say It Just Right Model
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Page 38 and 39: Personality Overlay 19BOLD PERSONAL
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Sticky Situations with Subordinates
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Chapter 7Sticky Situations in Meeti
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Chapter 8Sticky Romantic Situations
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Sticky Romantic Situations in the O
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Chapter 10Sticky Etiquette Situatio
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202 Appendix 14. True5. False6. Fal
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204 Appendix 1Strategic interviewer
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206 Appendix 2360 By Design®—Des
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IndexAdjourning Stage in groups, 10
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Index 211hot seat, 35-39How Good a
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Index 213Teenage Daughter Is Busted
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