Dissertation - World Federation of Music Therapy

them out. Questionnaires like these don’t really fit with me. I often thought it was a
pity. Maybe I should cheat a little, because – as I remember the scoring – there has
been no development within their framework. And that cannot directly be correlated
with the music therapy. On the contrary! And that is very important.
[Yes, very important. You are also right about your scoring. If we take the
questionnaires one by one: HADS first – anxiety scores have decreased, depression is
about the same.] Have you selected those, because there is a development? [Yes, there
is a development – HADS anxiety has decreased, as it should. SOC is almost
unchanged, and the same goes for QLQ-C30. The only marked change is the pain
scoring. You reported some pain at pre-test, and the score has decreased, but I guess
the decrease is not related to the music therapy process?] Certainly not! And this is
precisely what I find so difficult about these questionnaires – the changes I have
experienced cannot be attributed to any single influence. I know definitively, that the
so-called ’lack of change’ in my scores was influenced by my negative attitude
towards questionnaires like these – I don’t feel they illustrate me and my process. And
it is difficult for me to fill them out. I am not quite sure about the meaning of many of
the questions, and I can interpret them differently from time to time, and all that!
Another thing is that I am sure I would have felt worse and I might have scored lower
on several items, if I had not participated in this project. A third thing is that through
the music therapy (...) I feel more connected to myself, more present, and this means
that I have become more conscious about some of the more tiresome or difficult
things [in my life]. A positive change may not be indicated in the scores, but this
cannot be linked to the music therapy, it is almost the other way round.
[That is very important, and personally I am not sure how much these questionnaires
may show. On the other hand I find them a very productive basis for an interview! It
enables this discussion. I don’t think the scores are ’the hard facts’, while the rest of
the study deals with ’software’. ] No, I guess that is the challenge of so-called
scientific work. To adapt the specific language... (...)
If I take a look on my life now as compared to when we started [October] I am glad
that I am where I am now. I feel good. I am not depressive, I do not consider
drowning myself in the harbour. Many things are difficult, but many things are
working very well. Yes. But the questionnaires – they cannot really show that. I think
it will be more useful to look at Ellen’s notes. If I look at my own copies of the
transcripts I think it is absolutely fantastic what has happened.
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