Steven Pinker -- How the Mind Works - Hampshire High Italian ...

446 HOW THE MIND WORKSI he theory of parent-offspring conflict is an alternative to two popularideas. One is Freud's Oedipal complex, the hypothesis that boys have anunconscious wish to have sex with their mothers and kill their fathers,and therefore fear that their fathers will castrate them. (Similarly, in theElectra complex, little girls want to have sex with their fathers.) There isindeed a fact to be explained. In all cultures, young children are sometimespossessive of their mothers and cool to the mother's consort. Parent-offspringconflict offers a straightforward explanation. Daddy'sinterest in Mommy takes her attention away from me—and, even worse,threatens to create a baby brother or sister. Children may well haveevolved tactics for delaying that sad day by diminishing their mothers'interest in sex and keeping their fathers away from her. It would be astraightforward extension of weaning conflict. The theory explains whyso-called Oedipal feelings are as common in girls as in boys, and avoidsthe preposterous idea that little boys want to copulate with their mothers.Daly and Wilson, who proposed the alternative, believe that Freud'smistake was to run together two different kinds of parent-offspring conflict.Young children are in conflict with their father over access to theirmother, but it is not a sexual rivalry. And older children may have a sexualconflict with their parents, especially their fathers, but it is not a rivalryover the mother. In many societies fathers compete with their sons forsexual partners, explicitly or implicitly. In polygynous societies, where aman can have several wives, they might literally compete for the samewomen. And in most societies, polygynous or monogamous, a fathermust subsidize his son's quest for a wife at the expense of his other childrenor his own aspirations. The son may be impatient for the father tobegin diverting resources to him; a still-robust father is a roadblock to hiscareer. Filicides and parricides in most of the world are touched off bysuch competition.Parents also arrange marriages, which is a polite way of saying thatthey sell or trade their children. Here again interests can conflict. Parentsmay hammer out a package deal in which one child gets a catchand another gets a loser. In polygynous societies a father may trade hisdaughters for wives for himself. Whether a daughter is traded for adaughter-in-law or for a wife, her value can hinge on her virginity: mendon't want to marry a woman who might be carrying another man's child.