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No Time for a Loaf
SOME time ago, when a local corps was reviewed
by Sir Ian Hamilton, one officer was
mounted on a horse that had previously distinguished
itself in a bakery business. Somebody
recognized the horse, and shouted,
"Baker I" The horse promptly stopped dead,
and nothing could urge it on.
The situation was getting painful when the
officer was struck with a brilliant idea, and
remarked, "Not today, thank you." The procession
then moved on.
Those Short Skirts
BUTLER—"Miss Van Smythe asks, sir, if you
will step in the next room, as she wishes to
come down stairs."
His Boast
ARGUS boasted. "I can stand the eye for an
eye policy longer than anyone else," he cried.
St
What He Didn't Know
A COUNTRYMAN, in town for the day, grew
so bewildered in crossing a crowded street
that he stepped in front of a slowly moving
trolley car and was knocked down before it
could be stopped. More confused than hurt,
he scrambled to his feet right in the path of a
motorcycle coming on the other side of the
car, and was again bowled over. As he once
more got up he looked at the car and then at
the motorcycle.
"Huh!" he said. "I didn't know the blamed
thing had a colt."
766
Above the Footlights
"EVER notice the expression on the ballet
dancer's face?"
"No!"
"Look at it the next time!"
St
Causation
LAW PROFESSOR—"State briefly two grounds
for divorce."
STUDENT—"Jitney income, and limousine
wife."
Now They Don't Speak
"WHAT did you say that your age was?" he
asked between dances.
"I didn't say," smartly returned the girl,
"but I've just reached twenty-one."
"Is that possible !" he consoled. "What detained
you?"
Down-Trodden Sex
"Bv gorry, I'm tired."
"There you go! You're tired! Here I be
a-standin' over a hot stove all day an' you
wurkin' in a nice cool sewer!"
Scratched
"SOLOMON had a thousand wives."
"Then I bet he never carried his precinct."