SEXIS WRONG

One, in an age when high-ranking politicians feel that the bare
breast on a statue of Justice is offensive, well, maybe this
just isn’t a good time for tits.
Two, maybe directors are maturing and have realized that
something as gratuitous as a full rack nicely displayed but
which does not actually advance the plot in any way should
be left on the cutting room floor (or not filmed in the first
place).
Three, maybe the tit shot doesn’t come close to the sexiness
of the actual “action” in action films these days. In fact, it
might detract from the experience since nudity, so closely
associated with pornography, may destroy the suspension
of disbelief and force the viewer into an external, voyeuristic
mode. I could speculate that the sex we can’t show these
days has been transformed instead into violence...but I’d be
wrong. There are plenty of sexual themes and sex-related
plotlines in the recent breed of action films, even if the nudity
itself has been attenuated. There may be less nudity, but
When Wolverine reveals his claws
in X-Men: The Movie, it’s better than
Rocco Siffredi unzipping his pants.
there is more sex and sexiness than ever, both in carefully
choreographed “love scenes” and in the equally carefully
choreographed action sequences.
Yes, “every scene is a sex scene” in a film like this (thank
you, Mr. Bond), because action-film directors have figured
out what I—the slobbering audience member—want: a visceral,
physical experience which is akin to sex. We want to
“get off” on the violence in these films—it’s why we plunked
down our $9.50 per person to see it in a dark theater with
Dolby SurroundSound on a Friday night instead of renting the
DVD later (or using BitTorrent to pirate it off the Net). We
want to bleed with Mel Gibson, kick ass with Arnold Schwarzenegger,
and angst with Keanu Reeves. We want to be completely
sucked into the film, have our subconscious tossed
around, and come out whole and refreshed.
If that sounds kind of like what people want out of a session
with a dominatrix, that is no coincidence. I like that idea:
the action film itself as dominatrix—the kind who gets right
inside your head and can make you come without touching
you. Ahhh. See, the regular porn film—even the snazzy, highproduction-value
stuff that is put out by Vivid and Wicked,
even Jenna Jameson’s fanciest offerings these days—relies
on and even capitalizes on the fact that you, the porn viewer,
are aware of the fact that you are watching professionals who
fuck for a living. Not only are you aware of it, you accept it
and even may be a fan of it. The shaved snatches, the extra
makeup, the vignette-style sex scenes and set pieces that
have no connection to any plot or character, they all scream
at you: You’re watching porn! Now get off, dammit! For most
people, that’s all they need.
But maybe I’m not like most porn consumers. I’m a woman,
and although we all keep saying that women are taking over
the porn industry (mostly for politically correct reasons and
our own wish fulfillment), the majority of the porn made and
bought today is by and for men. You know the cliché: Men
are supposedly more voyeuristic than women. And men like
to be grabbed by the dick and jerked off, while women like to
be seduced.
For me, seduction is all about getting inside my head, engaging
my imagination, and getting those fantasy juices flowing.
This is why I like S/M sex—sure, the bondage and spanking
is fun for a sensation-whore like me, but it is the mindfuck,
the role-playing, and the fantasy aspects that really get me.
Your modern porn film does very little to engage the imagination—I’d
say most of them discourage it. If
you’re a fan of modern porn, you’re a fan of
watching sexual athletes at the top of their
game. This is not a knock on what they do;
they do it very well, but I find myself all too
often yawning in boredom because my head is not engaged.
I’m not in the story. I’m not living the part of the characters.
There is only one possible way to consume modern porn, and
that is as a voyeur.
So if nudity is one of the triggers to voyeurism, maybe we
ought to avoid it if we want to really get the audience to suspend
their disbelief and make them feel like they’re on the
rollercoaster with us.... I think this is one of the rationales
behind the disappearance of nudity in recent action films. Do
I miss those pretty knockers? Not at all, because today’s action
directors have gotten better and better at satisfying me.
Yes me, personally. I don’t think I can speak for the general
action-movie fan, since my erotic tastes can be pretty unique,
but when it comes to getting me hot and bothered, give me a
sword sliding out of its sheath any day. Sex used to ride gratuitously
on the surface of these films (because really, who
has time for an actual love scene when you’re busy saving the
world? The Matrix: Reloaded might be the one exception, and
that was mostly an excuse to have an extended music video
in the first act of the movie). Now the sexual images have
been sublimated into stylized violence, and the plots of the
movies are entangling our heroes, heroines, and, of course,
villains in ever more lust-laden plots.
We partly have the buttoned-up Chinese to thank for this.
Hong Kong action movies have been the pinnacle of non-Eng-
186 EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT SEX IS WRONG