The Individual, Auto/biography and History in South Africa

But Taylor persisted with the exercise in writing about her life in this fictional way, as a
means of ‘liberating’ herself. It was Tabata’s “deep imaginative insight” that “worked
out the need to take up this writing first”. And Tabata’s suggestion was based on his
reading of Richard Wright’s seminal 1940 autobiography, Black Boy, which was an
account of his childhood and young adulthood in the Jim Crow South, as he experienced
extreme poverty, white prejudice and violence, and of his growing awareness of a
literary interest. 32 Drawing on a key element of Wright’s work, Taylor agreed that the
writing of autobiography contained an element of fiction. Tabata’s suggestion came
from serious consideration of the place of autobiography and the use of fictional
elements in revealing social conditions. For Taylor, in recreating and adding to
incidents, “the emotion well[ed] up for the beginnings of life.” Nevertheless, “through
writing, what was dreamed up [was] liberated.” Instead of waiting for “the inspiration
… to come from the skies”, and “for confirmation to come from others”, Taylor
attempted to “make … just claim” to writing, and “give [herself] with confidence to the
effort of it”. 33
As a way of addressing the “tautness that is against writing”, Taylor had learnt “the
necessity of the relaxation of the whole being” from Tabata. 34 Even with Tabata’s
encouragement, there were hurdles to be overcome. As she wrote in her diary in her
solitary communication with Tabata:
B, my heart is full as if I were the young mother I was
trying to create. I do not know what it is to feel as a
daughter to a mother or to a father. It is a tremendous gap
in the life of a child. And somehow I must convey it. It is
the whole absence of a set of social sensations that must
affect one’s own experience as a mother with daughters. 35
In spite of the obstacles and challenges, the result was her “most mature work”, The
Rebel. Taylor recorded that she had “finished the story for B”, a work which was “born
32 Dora Taylor, Extended Diary, entry for 6 August 1953, Dora Taylor Papers.
33 Dora Taylor, Extended Diary, entries for 6 & 20 August 1953, Dora Taylor Papers.
34 Dora Taylor, Extended Diary, entry for 6 May 1953, Dora Taylor Papers.
35 Dora Taylor, Extended Diary, entry for 20 August 1953, Dora Taylor Papers.
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