Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

7. Increased fear of rejection.
8. Increased need for relational reassurance from a partner.
Of course, as an individual’s need for relational reassurance increases, so does their fear of being
rejected, and the perceptions of rejection spiral out of control.
As you may have guessed, there is a strong connection between John Bowlby’s attachment theory 102
and Karen Horney’s theory of rejection sensitivity. As you can imagine, rejection sensitivity has several
implications for interpersonal communication. In a study conducted by Geraldine Downey, Antonio
Freitas, Benjamin Michaelis, and Hala Khouri, the researchers wanted to track high versus low rejection
sensitive individuals in relationships and how long those relationships lasted. 103 The researchers also
had the participants complete the Rejection Sensitivity Questionnaire created by Geraldine Downey and
Scott Feldman. 104 The study started by having couples keep diaries for four weeks, which helped the
researchers develop a baseline perception of an individual’s sensitivity to rejection during the conflict.
After the initial four-week period, the researchers revisited the participants one year later to see what had
happened. Not surprisingly, high rejection sensitive individuals were more likely to break up during the
study than their low rejection sensitivity counterparts.
Key Takeaways
• The idea is that people exist on a continuum from highly extraverted (an individual’s
likelihood to be talkative, dynamic, and outgoing) to highly introverted (an
individual’s likelihood to be quiet, shy, and more reserved). Generally speaking,
highly extraverted individuals tend to have a greater number of interpersonal
relationships, but introverted people tend to have more depth in the handful of
relationships they have.
• In this chapter, three approach and avoidance traits were discussed: willingness
to communicate, shyness, and communication apprehension. Willingness to
communicate refers to an individual’s tendency to initiate communicative interactions
with other people. Shyness refers to discomfort when an individual is interacting
with another person(s) in a social situation. Communication apprehension is the
fear or anxiety associated with either real or anticipated communication with
another person or persons. Where WTC examines initiation of interpersonal
interactions, shyness discusses actual reserved interpersonal behavior, and CA is
focused on the anxiety experienced (or perceived) in interpersonal interactions.
• Argumentativeness refers to an individual’s tendency to engage in the open
exchange of ideas in the form of arguments; whereas, verbal aggressiveness is the
tendency to attack an individual’s self-concept instead of an individual’s arguments.
• Sociocommunicative orientation refers to an individual’s combination of both
assertive and responsive communication behaviors. Assertive communication
behaviors are those that initiate, maintain, and terminate conversations according
to their interpersonal goals during interpersonal interactions. Responsive
communication behaviors are those that consider others’ feelings, listens to
what others have to say, and recognizes the needs of others during interpersonal
interactions. Individuals who can appropriately and effectively utilize assertive and
responsive behaviors during interpersonal communication across varying contexts
are referred to as versatile communicators (or competent communicators).
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Interpersonal Communication