Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

The next major characteristic of systems is openness. The term openness refers to how permissive system
boundaries are to their external environment. Some families have fairly open boundaries. In essence,
these families allow for a constant inflow of information from the external environment and outflow
of information to the external environment. Other families are considerably more rigid about system
boundaries. For example, maybe a family is deeply religious and does not allow television in the home.
Furthermore, this family only allows reading materials that come from their religious sect and actively
prevents any ideas that may threaten their religious ideology. In this case, the family has a very rigid and
closed boundary. When families close themselves off from the external environment, they essentially
isolate themselves. Children who are reared in highly isolated family systems often have problems
interacting with other children when they come into contact with them in the external environment (e.g.,
school). Some families will choose to homeschool their children as another tool to close the family
system to foreign ideas and influences.
Complex Relationships
Ralph James
Shelly
It’s important to remember that all family systems
also have multiple subsystems. One of the areas
that Murray Bowen became very interested in
was how family subsystems develop and function
during times of crisis. In Bowen’s view, a couple
may be the basic unit within an emotional
Ralph James
relationship. Still, any tension between the couple
will usually result in one or both parties turning
Shelly
Polly
to others. If there are not others within the family
itself, partners will bring external people into
the instability. For example, James and Ralph
just got married. After a recent argument, Ralph
ended up talking to his best friend, Shelly, about
Ralph James
the argument (Figure 11.4). Bowen argues a twoperson
system under stress will draw in a third
party to provide balance, which ultimately creates
Shelly
Polly a two-helping-one or a two-against-one dynamic.
It’s also possible that James decides to talk to his
mother, Polly, which creates a different triangle.
Families are filled with relationship triangles.
Figure 11.4. Nature of Three
We could describe Ralph and James as parents
and Shell and Polly as their daughters just as easily.
These triangles are always being created and defined within a family unit when there is instability between
two people. During times of crisis, these triangles take on a solution to the instability in the two-person
relationship. Unfortunately, this “solution” is either two-helping-one or a two-against-one. 32 Basically, in a
triangle, there are now two people on one side and one on the other, so it gives a sense of balance. The
more family members we start to include, the more complicated these triangle structures become.
Equifinality
The final characteristic of family systems is equifinality. Equifinality is defined as the ability to get to the
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