Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

Metamessages
Metacommunication is known as communication about communication. Yet, are
relationship messages that are sent among people who they communicate. These messages can be
verbal, nonverbal, direct, or indirect. For instance, if you see two friends just talking about what they
did last weekend, they are also sending metamessages as they talk. Metamessages can convey affection,
appreciation, disgust, ridicule, scorn, or contempt. Every time you send messages to others, notice the
metamessages that they might be sending you. Do they seem upset or annoyed with certain things that
you say? In this book, we want to stress the importance of mindfulness when speaking. You may not
realize what metamessages you are sending out to others.
Words and Meanings
Words can have denotative meanings or connotative meanings. In this section, we will learn about the
differences and the triangle of meaning. 5 Researchers by the names of Ogden and Richards noticed that
misunderstandings occur
Symbolizes
“DOG”
Word/Symbol
Signifier
Cuddle Monster/
Best Friend
Thought/Reference
Signified
Figure 4.4 Signifier, Signified, and Referent
“Teddy”
Referent/
Object
Interpersonal Communication 126
Refers to
when people associate
different meanings with the
same message. Their model
(Figure 4.4) illustrates
that there is an indirect
association between a word
and the actual referent or
thing it represents.
As you can see, when
you hear the word “dog,”
it conjures up meaning for
different people. The word
“dog” itself is a symbol
and signifier, or sound
elements or other linguistic
symbols that represents
an underlying concept or
meaning. When we hear
the word “dog,” it is what
we call the “signified,”
or the meaning or idea
expressed when someone
hears the word. In this case,
maybe you have a dog, and
you really see that dog as
your best friend, or, as in
my case, you call him your