Interpersonal Communication- A Mindful Approach to Relationships, 2020a

As we’ve discussed with mindfulness throughout this text, one of the problems many people face is
an overly critical brain that seems to run non-stop. Cultivating self-love is about learning to make lifeaffirming
choices and not listening to the non-stop vulture sitting on our shoulders. A lot of the practices
we’ve discussed with mindfulness are in line with this idea of cultivating self-love.
Declare Your Own Authentic Beauty
Everyone is beautiful. Yet, we live in a society that places premiums on certain types of physical attributes
that get labeled “physically attractive” or “beautiful.” Declaring your own authentic beauty is about:
choosing to see and express ourselves just as we are—internal and external qualities combined. Exploring
beauty through a body positive lens teaches us to have a dynamic, engaged relationship with the world
around us. We honor our bodies as we pass through each developmental stage of life, which leads to true
self-care because we don’t confuse it with a desire to transform our physical selves to meet someone else’s
definition of beauty. 31
Now, we do not deny that we are bombarded by messages in our society that dictate beauty standards,
and it’s hard to avoid these images and not let them impact how we evaluate our physical appearance.
Learning to declare your authentic beauty is a process and not a process that’s going to happen overnight.
Instead, it’s important to point out those vulture statements when we see them and label them for what
they are. The more we start recognizing these vulture statements, the easier it will be to acknowledge our
beauty.
Build Community
The last competency in the Be Body Positive Model is building a community of likeminded people who
seek to build each other up instead of taking each other down. Many colleges and universities even have
Be Body Positive groups on campus to help support each other as we all learn to be more body positive.
Mindfulness Activity
For this activity, we want you to think through the Be Body Positive
Model within your own life. Answer the following questions:
1. How has the health care system failed you with regards to
reclaiming your health? How can you take control and reclaim
your health? What obstacles do you have in front of you? How can
you overcome them?
2. How can you approach food and exercise from a position of
self-care? Do you think you do this now? Why? If not, what is
preventing you from thinking about food and exercise from this
approach?
3. When was the last time you had a critical thought about your
physical appearance? How did you respond to that thought? Was it from a position of self-love? If
not, how could you have cultivated self-love in that moment?
4. What are five things that make you beautiful?
5. Do you have a group of people in your life that celebrate being body positive? If not, how could
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Interpersonal Communication